Sleepless Nights
by Only-eyes-for-Riddick
Summary: Alara is in love with Ed, but anyone can see that he is falling for his ex-wife. As a result she drinks her feelings away every night, until the day she wakes up next to Gordon. Could things get any more complicated? Yes, yes they can.
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own The Orville or any of the characters.**

 **Originally this story started off as something else, but transformed into the story before you. The pairing started off as one thing and then became something completely different as the characters led the way. I hope that you enjoy it. :)**

* * *

Alara awoke with a pounding headache. That was the last time she would be getting that drunk. Even as she said it, she know it was a lie. Lately all she wanted was to be off-duty and drink herself into a coma. If only to forget for a moment.

She knew it was ridiculous, but her emotions always got the better of her. One glance, one look from Ed and she was lost. In the end, he always smiled at Kelly. It would never be at her.

Alara tried to sit up, but a groan from behind her stopped her. It was only then, through the haze of her hangover, that she realized she wasn't alone in her bed.

Slowly she began to register the feeling of another body in her bed. An arm was slung over her midsection and a hard chest pressed up against her back.

She started to sift through her foggy memories of the night before. She had gotten very drunk, more so than usual, when she walked out into the hallway from the Mess Hall right into Captain Mercer. She could recall him looking down at her with those bright blue eyes, filled with concern for her. She could remember someone carrying her down the hallway, a pair of strong arms holding her. She could feel her lips pressing on another's, hands roaming her body... she blushed.

Had she slept with Ed and not remembered? Her heart leapt at the thought. Had her dreams finally come true?

Slowly, so as not to disturb the other person in her bed, she rolled over and felt her heart drop at the sight. More memories circled back as she remembered that Ed wasn't alone when she ran into him.

Gordon Malloy was sleeping soundly next to her without a care in the world.

Her mind cleared slightly as she recalled both Kelly and Gordon being with Ed when she bumped into him in the hallway. It had been Gordon who had volunteered to take her back to her quarters. He had carried her when she collapsed on the way, for once being the gentleman. He had been surprised when she kissed him, even trying briefly to push her away. She had been aggressive and his resolve had broken when she took off her clothes and threw him on the bed.

She must have confused him with Ed in her drunken state. That was the only explanation.

She covered her eyes in embarrassment. Gordon wasn't an unattractive man, but he wasn't the man she was in love with. He was a friend, a good friend, not a fuck buddy.

Another groan from the redhead indicated he was starting to awaken. Alara felt her body fill with panic. She could not be here, in bed with him, naked, when that happened. Slowly she slid out of the bed and rushed into the bathroom.

If she was going to face Gordon after a one-night stand then she was going to do it fully clothed. She turned on the water in the sink and proceeded to brush her teeth, washing the taste of alcohol and sleep out of her mouth, taking her mind off the man in the room just beyond the door.

* * *

Gordon blinked awake slowly. For a moment he wondered where he was as he looked about the room. This wasn't his quarters, this was...Alara's quarters.

The events of the previous night came back to him as his mind cleared. Alara had been very drunk and aggressive. He had tried to resist, but he couldn't fight her and found that he hadn't wanted to once she got him in the bed.

He sat up and rubbed his eyes before running his fingers through his short, red hair.

He looked around the room and found that he was alone. He could hear the water running the next room, Alara had awoken first and was hiding out in the bathroom. All the best, he wasn't sure how to face her.

He hadn't intended to sleep with her. When she started kissing him so passionately he had tried to push her away. He preferred sober women who know who he was and what was going on. For some reason he couldn't push Alara away even knowing that she was drunk. After she got him in her bed and started to remove her clothing his resolve had disappeared and he had indulged in what she was offering. He should have tried harder to resist her, but he just hadn't. He couldn't believe himself. He sighed before standing, looking around the floor for his clothes.

He found his clothes quickly mixed in among her pieces. More memories of the night came back to him as he dressed.

Alara's lips on his, on his skin. Her hands roaming his body, her body in his hands. Her moans in his ears. The feel of her body over his, under his. Her voice as she drifted off to sleep afterwards, both of them exhausted.

Gordon took a deep breath as those words came back to him, those words he had almost forgotten as sleep overtook them the night before. He dressed quickly, his eyes glancing over to the bathroom door, listening for any movement from within indicating her coming back out.

After he dressed he checked the time, he was due on the bridge soon, not enough time to go to his quarters and get a clean uniform. He shrugged. It wouldn't be the first time he worked in a dirty uniform.

He glanced one last time at the bathroom door. For a moment he wondered if he should wait for her to come out, but those words from the night before came back to him and he decided that this was for the best. Saying nothing would be the best, for now. He was still barely awake and on-duty in a short time.

He turned and walked out of the room and then out of Alara's quarters heading towards the bridge. He couldn't be late, especially today.

* * *

Alara opened the bathroom door and found that the man she had left in her bed was gone. She let out a breath of relief. Even after a shower and dressing she didn't know what she would have said to him.

She know that her shift on the bridge would start soon, that she would have to see him there, but she would be professional and say nothing. Hopefully he would do the same.

She was halfway to the bridge when she ran into Kelly.

"Hey Alara," she said cheerfully.

"Commander," she replied with a smile.

Kelly smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Can I see you in my office for a moment?" she said. Although it was framed as a question, Alara didn't miss the order in the tone. Something was up.

"Of course," she replied, now confused.

The two women walked into Kelly's office and took a seat, each on one side of Kelly's desk. She looked at Alara with a serious and firm gaze.

"Alara, I think you are aware of why I wanted to speak with you."

It took Alara a moment to piece together what Kelly wanted to talk to her about, her drinking. For months she had been able to keep it secret and in just one night it was all out in the open. She cursed her bad luck.

Out loud she responded with a dejected. "Yes, sir."

Kelly started to talk about how, as Head of Security, while a drink or two when off-duty was alright, getting so drunk that she nearly collapsed was unacceptable. The words hit Alara hard. She didn't realize that this was such a big deal. She just wanted to forget.

Forget that the man she was in love with was so obviously still into the woman before her.

"Do we have an understanding Lt. Kitan?"

Alara nodded. "Yes, sir," she responded. "I'm sorry and it will never happen again."

Kelly nodded. "Okay. I won't put this in your file this time."

Alara nodded her understanding. She knew that this should have been put in her file, but Kelly was being courteous. She was lucky.

Of course, this meant that she wouldn't have another way to forget about Ed anymore. She would have to find another outlet going forward. And whatever she did, it would have to be in the privacy of her quarters, away from prying eyes.

After being released from Kelly's office, Alara walked to and onto the bridge.

Usually she would cast a quick glance at Ed, but today she instead cast a glance at Gordon.

He was focused on his station as if ignoring her presence. She decided to do the same. She relieved the security officer that had been there and took her place, quickly getting herself wrapped up in her bridge duties and putting the night and the activities that happened behind her.

* * *

After the longest and dullest shift in her career Alara was ready when she was relieved of duty to head back to her quarters. All she wanted was to go to sleep and forget everything, even if she couldn't drink her sadness away.

Today had been another day of listening to Ed and Kelly argue-flirt and all it did was hurt Alara to hear and watch. Even though she liked Kelly, Alara wished that they had a male Commander for Ed. If they did then she would never have to worry about Ed flirting with him in front of her. She may even have had a chance.

With Kelly and their shared history...it was impossible.

She rounded the corner to head to her quarters and stopped short, her eyes widening in shock.

Gordon was standing at her door, casually leaning against the wall. Alara's mind raced.

What could he possibly have to say? What did he want? Why was he here?

Briefly she considered turning and heading in the opposite direction, running anywhere by here. She didn't want to talk about the previous night or why she had been drunk. She just wanted to be alone.

Just as she was getting ready to move his head turned and those brown eyes found hers. She felt a shiver run through her, but it wasn't unpleasant, just confusing. She took a deep breath, straightened her back and approached him. There was no reason to be nervous, it was just Gordon.

He didn't move as she approached which only made her more curious about what was going on.

"Can I help you?" she said as she reached her door, her voice calm.

"We need to talk," he said firmly, his voice low. He didn't look like himself right now, he looked almost...serious. "I'm sure you wouldn't want an audience for it."

Based on how serious he looked and what had transpired the night before, she knew that was probably the truth. She opened the door and led him inside. As soon as the door shut behind them she continued over to her sitting area and sat, picking up her tablet as she did, trying to look busy. "What is it?" she said without looking at him.

"You are in love with Ed."

Alara's head shot up, her eyes wide as she looked at the redhead. He still looked serious and almost a bit angry. She didn't know how he had heard, but she swallowed down her nervousness and decided to play dumb. Maybe he would think he was wrong? "What did you say?"

He took a few steps forward until he was standing next to her, looking down at her as she sat. "You're in love with Ed."

Alara tried to hold back the blush she knew was filling her cheeks. She looked back down at the tablet in her hands, unable to keep his gaze. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"You may have been drunk last night," he said firmly, "but I wasn't. You said his name in your sleep."

She couldn't hold back the blush now and her face turned bright red in embarrassment. She looked back up at him, wide eyed and nervous. "I did?"

Gordon nodded. He remembered the moment vividly now that he had had time to process everything that had happened in the last 24 hours. After they had finished and were beginning to drift off, she had said clear as day those words, "I love you, Ed." He had been too tired to say or do anything at the time, but now...

Honestly, he was more hurt than angry, which surprised him. Oh, the anger was there of course, but for some reason he could feel pain more than anger at knowing she had confused him for another man. Not just any man either, but his best friend, Ed. If he had known that Ed and Alara had something going on he would have tried harder to resist her.

Looking at her now, red faced, embarrassed and almost cute, he almost felt guilty for saying anything. This is where the anger held him and kept him here.

"I don't appreciate being a substitute for whatever game you and Ed have going on, even if he is my best friend."

Alara stood, their bodies only inches apart now. She looked up at him with those wide eyes and guilt flooded him, but he refused to acknowledge it.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I was drunk and sad and...I, well, I..." she took a deep breath. "I have feelings for Captain Mercer, it's true," she said. Hearing those words again caused a fresh wave of pain to course through Gordon, although he didn't know why.

"He knows nothing about it," she continued. "There is no 'game'. I would never have said those things sober or hurt anyone by saying another man's name when together...like that."

Tears began to fill Alara's eyes now. Gordon had never really seen Alara cry before and the sight caused all anger to fade instantly.

"Besides," she said, "anyone can see he's going to get back together with the Commander, with Kelly. It's so obvious." The tears were falling now and she was starting to babble. She didn't even notice that Gordon's expression had changed from serious to concerned. "I know that I shouldn't have fallen for him, that it was the stupidest thing I could have do. Then I get drunk and sleep with another man only to say Ed's name in the bedroom. I just..."

Alara found herself silenced as a pair or arms surrounded her, her head gently pushed to rest against a hard chest.

"Calm down," he said softly, his voice calm and soothing now. "Your secret is safe with me."

Alara relaxed in his gentle embrace. That hadn't been a concern of hers until he said he would keep it safe. She took a deep breath and allowed him to hold her a few moments more. It was warm and safe, something she hadn't realized she wanted until that moment. It surprised her that the goofball Gordon would be the one to provide it to her.

When she pulled back, he released her easily, his arms dropping to his sides. She felt cold and suddenly wished his arms had remained around her, but she shook that thought out of her head. That was a silly and strange thought.

"Thank you," she said with a slight smile. "And I'm sorry again."

Gordon shrugged, as if women always called another man's name while in bed with him. "No worries," he said with a smirk. "We good?"

She nodded. "Yeah, we're good."

The smirk turned into a smile. "Alright." He took a deep breath. "We'll just forget the whole thing, I guess?"

"That would probably be best," she replied with a relieved tone. "Thank you again."

He nodded his agreement, ignoring how much it hurt that she could so easily forget perhaps the best night of his life.

Gordon waved good-bye as he headed out of her quarters, leaving Alara alone. She yawned, suddenly tired and headed into the bedroom.

Perhaps a good night's sleep would wash away these feelings for Ed, or at least allow her a momentary dream of something she knew she would never have.

Tomorrow would be a new day.


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't own The Orville or any of the characters, just taking them for a spin.**

Alara was glad that things had gone back to normal between her and Gordon, even though they had slept together. It also seemed as if he really was keeping her secrets, even from John. She was glad that she had one element of her life that she could consider going well.

As for the rest of it, she seemed to be having issues. She kept making small mistakes at her station, her reports had been getting sloppy and even when she was working out she would accidentally miss the bag and it would knock her over.

All of this stemmed from the fact that over the last two weeks, she just hadn't been getting much sleep.

It wasn't like she didn't try to sleep or that she wasn't tired, but when she fell into bed she ended up tossing and turning, getting maybe two or three hours sleep before she had to be back on the bridge.

Luckily the mistakes were so minor and she was keeping mostly to herself that no one really noticed anything was amiss. No one, except Gordon.

"You look tired," he said one morning in the lift heading to the bridge. Alara glared at him, but couldn't deny his statement.

"Not sleeping well," she explained as she yawned for what seemed like the millionth time.

"Maybe you should take the afternoon off or something, get some rest."

She knew that he was trying to help, but her sleep-deprived brain wasn't functioning at full capacity and she snapped. "I'm fine."

Gordon seemed taken aback at the tone, but still looked concerned.

After another few moments of silence between them he spoke again. "At least see Claire," he said softly. "She may have something to help."

Alara looked at Gordon in surprise. That thought had not crossed her mind in the whole two weeks she hadn't been able to sleep. "That's a good idea," she said softly. "I think I'll do that. Thank you."

The doors opened and Gordon walked through. "No problem," he said over his shoulder as he headed to the bridge.

Alara, instead of exiting as planned, stayed in the lift and went down to the medical bay. If she was going to see Claire, the sooner the better. Before long those minor mistakes would turn into major ones.

She entered Sick Bay to find Claire alone, which suited Alara fine. Better to just talk to Claire without having a whole group of people hearing her problems.

At the sound of the door opening, Claire had turned. She was surprised to see Alara there. "Alara? Is everything alright?"

Alara moved towards the doctor. "Honestly, I'm not sure," she replied. "I've been having trouble sleeping for longer than a few hours each night."

Claire seemed to think on this for a moment. "Odd," she said before gesturing to a nearby exam table. "Have a seat."

As Alara hopped up on the table, Claire grabbed her scanner and walked over to Alara. She started scanning her slowly up and down. "Any other symptoms?"

Alara shook her head. "No, just a lack of sleep."

Claire nodded as she continued her scan. Alara had always found Claire a bit hard to read, so if anything was wrong she wasn't sure she would know unless Claire said something.

After what seemed like the longest scan she had every seen Claire do on someone Claire finally spoke. "I'm not seeing anything off," she said firmly as she set the scanner down. "It may be psychological. When was the last time you remember sleeping well?"

Alara started thinking back to when her sleep issues began. The last two weeks she hadn't slept well, mostly because she hadn't been able to drink herself to sleep. In fact the last time she slept well was the night she slept with Gordon.

"Alara?"

Alara looked up at Claire with wide eyes. She couldn't say that she slept well when Gordon had been with her. She cleared her throat. "About two weeks ago," she said softly.

Claire raised an eyebrow at Alara's odd behavior, but said nothing about it. "Okay, I would suggest trying doing what you did that night and see if that helps. If not, I can offer some sleeping pills to help temporarily."

Alara took a deep breath at Claire's suggestion. What was going on in her life right now?

She thanked Claire for her suggestion and let her know that she would try that, although how she didn't know. She left Sick Bay and headed to take her place on the bridge for her shift. She wouldn't be able to think about any of it until her shift was over.

Although she had no idea what she was going to do or how she would suggest anything to Gordon.

Luckily it was a mostly boring day with the Orville just doing mundane scans and delivering some supplies. The entire time Alara kept her eyes on her station doing her best not to think about the man at the helm only a few feet away from her.

Gordon's shift ended a bit before hers and she knew from her security checks that he and John had requested time in the simulator that evening. At least she knew where he would be.

After her long shift finally ended, Alara wasted no time heading down to the simulator and entering their simulation.

It was an old saloon from early Earth history, complete with a bar and rowdy cowboys. She quickly scanned the room finding both men sitting in period costumes at a table playing cards, each of them with a busty woman on their laps.

Alara felt a rush of anger fill her at the sight, but then wondered why that would be. There was no reason why she should feel bothered by the sight of Gordon with another woman. She shook her head, sure that this was a result of sleep-deprivation. She crossed the room, her eyes fixed on Gordon.

He was a handsome man, she could admit that, with a boyish smile. He looked rugged in the cowboy outfit he had on and the light beard across his jawline.

The woman on his lap kept giggling and whispering in his ear as he played. That was annoying, although Alara wasn't sure why.

When she stood next to him she cleared her throat, gaining the attention of both men. John seemed confused by her presence and Gordon seemed surprised.

"Lt. Malloy, could I speak with you..." she glanced at John momentarily before looking back at Gordon, "...privately?"

John looked at Gordon with an obvious "what did you do now?" look, but Gordon didn't seem to notice.

"Um...sure," he replied before lifting the woman off his lap and standing. He turned to John. "Keep playing, I'll be right back," he said to a now curious John. John opened his mouth to say something when the woman Gordon had removed plopped herself onto John's lap next to his own girl and both started giggling and flirting with him.

Sure now that John was sufficiently distracted, Gordon lead Alara over to the bar area on the opposite side of the room where John wouldn't accidentally overhear.

"So, whats up?" Gordon said, his tone light.

Alara took a deep breath, her face flushing slightly. Gordon couldn't help thinking that it was a cute look for the usually together Head of Security.

"Claire gave me some advice on how to fix my sleeping issue," she said. Gordon nodded, looking confused as to what this had to do with him. "She suggested that I go back to the last time I slept well and try recreating that night to see if that helped. The last time I slept well was...well...it was that night."

It took Gordon less than a minute to make the connection to which night she was talking about. The same night he had been thinking about for the past two weeks, the same night that randomly popped into his head when he looked at Alara, the same night that he couldn't get out of his head no matter how hard he tried.

"Really?" he said in shock. He lifted his hand and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. He didn't want to admit that he had wanted a repeat of that night. He didn't know why as he had never looked at Alara as a potential partner before. She was his crew mate and friend.

She was also in love with Ed.

At that thought he couldn't help the anger that rushed over him. "So," he said firmly, "You want to get drunk, have sex with me and then confess your feelings for another man?"

Alara's eyes widened at his angry tone. Although he had said that he forgave and forgot, he apparently hadn't done so. She couldn't blame him for that, it couldn't be easy to think that he was being substituted for another person. She knew that she wouldn't stand for it. Still, to accuse her of wanting to actively hurt him again.

"No," she said firmly, "I just think that we could try sleeping, just sleeping, in the same bed."

He narrowed his eyes at her as if trying to figure her out and Alara could feel her patience wearing thin. Lack of sleep was making her irritable and the look on his face and his attitude was pushing her over the edge.

"Look," she said sharply, "I'm sorry about what happened. Obviously I'm so guilty about it I can't sleep. I would try getting black-out drunk like I was that night, but I'm already on thin ice with the Commander as it is. I just thought I would ask you for help. If it doesn't work Claire said she would give me something to help but it could only be temporary and only if everything else didn't work. I just..." she let out a breath. She looked back up at him, her eyes showing how tired she really was. "Never mind, it's crazy."

She turned to walk away when she felt a gentle grip on her arm, stopping her movements. She turned back to him as he released her ignoring how that small touch from him had caused her heart to flutter. She must be more tired than she thought.

"Sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to go off on you like that. It just...doesn't feel good being compared to someone, even your best friend." She nodded her understanding. Gordon smiled at her. "I'll help you out."

He watched as her tired eyes lit up with hope, causing his stomach to flip-flop. "Really?" she said softly, her voice filled with hope.

He nodded. "Couldn't hurt to try." Gordon suddenly found himself in a tight hug. His brain started to malfunction as all he did was feel and remember. Her soft curves pressed against his firm body, her soft skin against his, her lips on his... It felt so right.

But she was in love with Ed.

That thought alone popped him back to the present as Alara released him expressing her thanks.

"It's no problem," he said with a smile before registering that this conversation with Alara had gone a bit long and now John's gaze was upon them. He was going to need a good excuse for this depending on how much the man had seen.

"Still," Alara said with a smile, unaware of John's curious gaze. She really was tired if she hadn't noticed it. "I cannot thank you enough. I'll see you later, my quarters?"

Still aware of his friend's gaze, Gordon nodded at Alara. Her smile seemed to bring life back to her tired features as she turned and left the simulator.

Gordon took a deep breath before turning back to where John and the card game were waiting, although right now he wasn't interesting in dealing with either of them.

"What was that about?" John said as Gordon returned to his seat. He spoke casually, but Gordon knew he was beyond curious.

"Not much," he said with a shrug. "I had noticed she wasn't well earlier and suggested going to Claire for help. She was just filling me in on what Claire said and thanking me for the suggestion." It was true. Gordon knew that if he tried to straight out lie John would be able to see through it, but telling the truth, granted with parts missing, would be harder for him to figure out, even as smart as he was.

John seemed to accept this, but Gordon noticed how throughout the rest of the game the man kept glancing at him, as if trying to figure out if there was more to this story than Gordon was telling him.

The next hour seemed to go on forever before they reached the end of their allotted time in the simulator and had to leave.

"Wanna get a drink?"

Gordon shook his head, aware that Alara was waiting. If she really did think his presence would help her sleep then he should get there quickly.

"What? Got a hot date or something?" John joked with a nudge. Gordon laughed with his friend at the stupid line despite how accurate it was.

'Or something,' Gordon thought before they parted ways.

Gordon stopped off at his quarters first to change back into his regular clothes before heading to Alara's quarters. It would draw much less attention that way.

Even though he knew nothing was going to happen, that he literally was going to just see if being there helped her sleep, he couldn't help feeling a bit excited.

Even when he first met her he noticed how attractive she was, sexy. He also knew that she was strong, mentally as well as physically. She wanted him in her bed, even if essentially he was filling in the role of a teddy bear rather than a man. Maybe he could convince she needed him as a man instead?

Gordon shook his head as he continued down the corridors. He didn't know what was going on with him lately. All he could focus on recently was Alara.

Even when he masturbated it was to her image, as she was that night. He could even hear her voice sometimes when he envisioned her. How pathetic.

This whole situation was Ed's fault really. Although they had been friends for years, Gordon knew Ed was very single-minded and oblivious to what others had going on around him. If Alara said nothing Ed would never know how she felt about him. He would never make a move on her with the knowledge of how she felt about him.

Of course, Alara wouldn't say anything either. She was right on the nose about how obvious Ed was about Kelly. The two had been spending a lot of time together and seemed to actually be getting along. He would be surprised if Ed fell under Kelly's spell a second time.

Gordon didn't think it was a good idea, but then again he wasn't the marrying type either. After watching his parents marriage basically fall apart with only him holding it together he never wanted any part of it.

He stopped that train of thought when he realized he had reached Alara's quarters. He lifted his hand and pushed the comm, hearing the bell ding inside. He pushed all thoughts of Alara, Ed and Kelly out of his mind. Right now he had a role to play for their Chief of Security. She needed her sleep and Gordon would do what he could to see that she got it, even if it killed him.

The door opened to Alara looking way better than he had remembered. She was out of her uniform and had changed into a tank top and a pair of shorts that revealed way too much skin for a woman asking a male friend to sleep, and only sleep, with her. Her hair was messy and her eyes looked more tired than they had only an hour or so before. Still, Gordon couldn't help the heat rush through him at the sight of her.

He stepped inside her quarters and allowed the door to close behind him, engulfing them in darkness. He pushed any indecent thought out his head, Alara needed sleep, not a sex-crazed man lusting after her.

"Guessing you've had no luck sleeping?" he said in a casual tone that revealed none of the dirty thoughts he was currently having about her.

She shook her head and yawned. "All I do is toss and turn," she said, her voice low and sleepy. Even her voice was sexy like this.

He nodded before removing his jacket and shoes. He turned to her and gestured to the bedroom. "Let's see if me being here helps."

Gordon followed Alara into the bedroom, trying his best to push the memories of the last time he was with her in this room from his mind. She just needed him to sleep, she didn't want to have sex. Not with him. She was in love with Ed, wanted Ed. He had to remember that.

Alara climbed into the bed and Gordon walked to the other side and laid down on top of the covers, still dressed in his undershirt and pants. She laid facing him and took a deep breath.

"I hope this works," she said before shutting her eyes.

Gordon tried to stay as still as he could so Alara could fall asleep easier. He felt awkward but listened as Alara's breathing seemed to even out a bit. Maybe this would work.

He heard her shuffle a bit and then watched as her arm came across and fell upon his chest softly, her head curved against his shoulder, her breath caressing his skin.

Alara had cuddled up against him. Gordon heard her take a deep breath, sigh and settle before her breathing evened out indicating she had fallen asleep.

Gordon let out a breath of his own, willing his body to remain still. Alara had no idea that this was torture for him, having her against him so close and wearing so little. He knew that she needed her sleep so he forced himself to relax and shut his own eyes.

Maybe it would do him good to sleep as well.

He took a deep breath, inhaling the smell of Alara's scent, let it out slowly and drifted off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**I don't own The Orville or any of the characters.**

* * *

Alara yawned as she awoke feeling more refreshed than she had in weeks. She opened her eyes slowly, her body relaxed and comfortable. As her eyes came into focus she found she was staring a wall of black. Her mind connected the dots quickly, a black shirt on a man, on Gordon.

She remembered falling asleep with him lying next to her on the bed over the covers. She took quick stock of their current position and blushed.

Her arms had one wrapped around his waist and the other was curled up against him with her hand on his chest, his arms were also wrapped around her in a gentle embrace. His legs were next to hers but still over the covers.

She glanced up at him to see that he was asleep. Somehow, in sleep, they had ended up like this.

His dark red hair was sticking up and his beard felt soft against her forehead when she moved. It surprised her as she had always thought facial hair was coarse and rough, but not Gordon's.

He looked peaceful as he slept, his breath barely whispering against the top of her head.

Those same flutters came over her as she looked at him. She wasn't sure what the reason was this time as she had a well-rested night. What the hell was going on with her?

She took a deep breath to stop the flutters and it worked momentarily, but as soon as she looked back at his sleeping face they returned.

Perhaps she was sick. She would have to ask Claire about it at a later time.

She tried to move out of Gordon's arms, but as soon as she started to back away his grip on her tightened, pressing her closer to his body. Her hand on his chest pressed tighter against him. He was more muscular than she thought under his uniform. Her face flushed as she recalled bits of memories from the last time they had been in this room together, in her bed together.

Gordon's lips on her skin, his soft beard caressing her skin as he moved, his body flexing and moving over her own, under her own.

She looked back down at her hand on his chest and tried to recall what he looked like before quickly shooing that thought away. They had decided to forget that night, they were crew mates and friends. It wasn't in their best interests to think about that sort of thing.

She was brought back to the present from her thoughts as she heard Gordon take a deep breath. "Alara," he muttered in his sleep softly. She froze. He had said her name that night too, many times, soft against her skin, groaning next to her ears as he moved with her, softly and passionately.

Alara could feel her body flush with heat at the memories as Gordon cuddled closer to her, as if trying to meld their two bodies into one.

She glanced up at him, watching as slowly he started to awaken. She prayed that her blush had gone away.

Slowly his eyes opened to reveal those dark brown eyes, those same eyes that had looked upon her with such desire now looked at her in a slight haze that gave him a dreamy expression, as if not quite awake.

Had Gordon always looked like this? Was she blind?

He blinked and slowly seemed to realize where he was and who with. Those eyes widened in confusion and then relaxed with understand. "Good morning," he said.

His voice when first waking up was deep, husky and sexy. It caused shivers to run down Alara's spine. She shook those thoughts out of her head. This was Gordon, the goofball, the joker, not an object for her lust.

"Good morning," she replied with more calmness than she felt. "Do you mind...um...?"

It was then that Gordon seemed to realize the position they were lying in together. He looked at her confused, as if unsure how he had gotten there, before quickly removing his arms, releasing her, and sitting up.

Alara instantly felt cold.

"So, did it work?"

It took Alara a moment to understand what he meant. Sleeping. His presence. The whole point of him being here to begin with.

She sat up herself, the blanket falling to her waist. "Yeah, best sleep I've had in a while."

Gordon looked at her with a slight smile. "Glad I could help."

"I hope I didn't bother you while you slept."

Gordon knew he had slept well, but the dreams he had were only of Alara and almost all of them were X-rated. But he couldn't tell her that. "Nah! I slept great." Alara smiled. Gordon couldn't help thinking she had a great smile and he always wanted to see her smiling.

As they smiled at each other Gordon began to feel a bit awkward, unsure of where to go from here. It wasn't everyday that he slept in the same bed as a female friend that wasn't sexual. He didn't know what to say now.

Alara seemed to have the same issue. Her face was even flushed slightly as she looked away as if embarrassed, which only only made her more attractive. Before he knew it he was leaning towards her.

"I'm glad you finally got some sleep," he said, his voice deepening. Alara turned to him and seemed surprised at his closeness to her, yet she didn't back away. "Although it was difficult to hold a beautiful woman all night and not make a move."

Alara felt her heart skip a beat, her body start to warm. On instinct she licked her lips drawing his eyes there. Fire flooded her veins as she suddenly had the intense desire for him to kiss her. She leaned closer drawing his eyes back to hers.

Inches from each other now, the room thick with sexual tension. She could feel his breath soft against her cheeks, caressing her skin. The slightest brush of his lips sent tingles up her spine, making her want more.

"Bridge to Lt. Kitan!"

Both Alara and Gordon jumped back as Bortus' voice penetrated Alara's quarters, their eyes looking at the other in shock, as if not realizing what had just happened.

"Bridge to Lt. Kitan!"

Alara shook her head, clearing the fog from her mind. She took a deep breath. "Lt. Kitan here, go ahead."

"The Captain is requesting your presence."

"Understood. On my way."

The connection to the bridge severed, Alara cast a glance at Gordon, who had already stood. "I should get out of here so you can change," he said, his back to her. "See ya later."

Alara didn't know what to say as she watched him walk out of the room, grab his shoes and jacket from the other room, slip the shoes on and walk out of her quarters without looking at her.

Alara didn't know what had just happened, didn't know how to process it, but she shook it out of her mind for now.

Right now she had to get dressed and going. Ed was waiting for her.

Gordon tried not to think about what had just happened as he walked down the corridors to his own quarters, but it was fruitless.

Alara had just looked so alluring and tempting. He hadn't tried to do or say anything that would result in anything. He really was trying to just be a friend helping out another friend.

Her lips had been so soft, that brief touch causing his whole body to harden. He had wanted to deepen it, lay her on the bed and hold her with nothing between them.

He shook that thought out of his head. That would have been a mistake. Alara was in love with Ed, he would be stupid to get involved with her like that. It wouldn't lead anywhere and just leave him hurt in the end.

Still, he wasn't sure if Bortus' interruption was a blessing or a curse.

He reached his quarters he quickly changed into a clean uniform. As he rushed out he ran into John who was also on his way to the bridge.

"Whoa man, in a hurry?"

Gordon laughed. "Yeah. Running a little behind today," he said as he side stepped his friend.

"Maybe next time take a change of clothes with you."

Gordon froze. He took a deep breath before slowly turning back to a smiling John. "What?"

John looked at Gordon with knowing eyes. "You didn't sleep in your quarters last night, so the question really is, where were you?"

Gordon looked at his friend with slightly narrowed eyes before he chuckled the nerves away. He had to keep this secret to protect Alara. "What? Of course I was in my quarters. Why wouldn't I be?"

John took a step closer causing Gordon's smile to fade slightly. "I'm not as dumb as I look," he said. "I came by and you weren't there. Hell, I came by twice, both last night and this morning."

Gordon looked confused now. "Why?"

John rolled his eyes. "I wanted to check up on you cause you were acting weird yesterday after Alara talked to y..." John froze, his eyes narrowed as in deep thought before they widened and he looked at Gordon with wide eyes.

Shit.

"Dude...did you...with Alara?"

Gordon grabbed John and pulled him into his quarters. No way was anyone going to hear this conversation, even if he had sew John's mouth shut.

John was still talking, looking at his friend in shock. "You slept with Alara? Dude!"

Gordon looked at him with a serious expression. "No, it's not like that."

"Then what is it like? For that matter, how did this happen? You guys never seemed to have an interest in each other before."

Gordon shut his eyes in frustration. He didn't know what this was with Alara, there was no way he could explain that to someone else. John was right, this was ridiculous. Alara was in love with another man, his best friend and boss, and he... he just didn't know what he was to Alara. That caused a sharp pain to fill him but he ignored it.

"Listen," he said firmly looking at John, "it's not like that. We just slept. Nothing happened."

John shook his head as Gordon confirmed what he had already figured out. "I just can't believe it, you and Alara. It's a weird pairing."

Gordon shook his head. "There is nothing like that between us." He grabbed John by the shoulders, forcing the other man to look at him. "You need to keep quiet about this. Alara...well she..." he didn't know how to say this without bursting out Alara's love for Ed. "Just you cannot say anything about this. Besides...nothing happened anyways."

Gordon released John, his eyes staying serious. John looked at his friend with curious eyes.

"Somehow, I feel like you wish something had happened."

* * *

Alara was nervous as she walked to Ed's office. What did he want and why did he call her?

She couldn't think of anything she might have done or said recently that would need her to be called into his office.

For a moment she allowed herself the hope that he might actually care about her too, that he might want her too. The thought filled her with excitement, but it wasn't as strong as it usually was.

She pushed the button to alert him to her presence and entered at his call.

Ed was at his desk typing and looked up at her with those beautiful blue eyes. She smiled at him as if her heart wasn't pounding like crazy.

Which it wasn't like normally...strange.

"Alara! Come on in." Alara walked in and sat before Ed, confused as to why she wasn't feeling like she normally did around him.

"Yes, Captain?"

Ed sat back in his chair, casual about this meeting with her. It calmed Alara to know that if he was being casual then she wasn't in any trouble or being reprimanded. It just confused her more on what he wanted with her.

"I wanted to check in with you," he said before standing up and walking around the desk. He stopped next to her and leaned back on the desk looking down at her. His arms remained at his sides. "I've been worried about you these last few weeks."

Alara expected her heart to start pounding at his nearness like usual, but it didn't. "Oh?"

Ed looked concerned but was relaxed, giving a feeling of calmness about the conversation. "A couple weeks ago you were hammered, nearly black out drunk, and could not even walk to your own quarters on your own. Then these last two weeks I've seen that some of your reports have been a bit sloppy and even have some things misspelled or missing. Nothing major, but worrisome going forward. Is everything okay?"

Alara wasn't sure how to respond. Was it okay that she was in love with the man in front of her that didn't realize her feelings? Was it okay that she could apparently only sleep in bed with another man she wasn't in love with? Was it okay that despite the fact that she had been in love with Ed for so long her heart wasn't pounding in his presence?

As far as she could tell things were not okay, at least with her.

However, to Ed, she responded, "I understand your concern. I was going through a few personal things and was not responding well to them. I already spoke with the Commander about the drinking and have been doing well in that respect. The last few weeks I had an issue sleeping. After talking with Claire I think that I've uncovered a way to resolve that issue."

Alara left out Gordon in that conversation. She didn't need that being broadcast across the ship.

Ed smiled before patting her on the shoulder. Normally this would make her blush or cause shivers to run down her spine. Today, she felt none of those things. She didn't even blush.

"Good to hear," Ed said.

Ed's touch didn't cause the same intense feelings invoked in her as when Gordon touched her, even briefly.

She mentally shook her head, pushing Gordon out of her thoughts. Something was wrong with her if she was confusing her feelings for Ed towards Gordon. Maybe she needed more sleep.

Ed dismissed her and she went to her post on the bridge. She tried not to glance at Gordon who was already at his post working, but she found her eyes wandering to him briefly anyways.

He was focused on his station and flying the ship. It was like he didn't even notice she had come on the bridge. He was acting like nothing happened.

Which nothing had happened. They had just slept in the same bed. It was just one friend helping another friend. The kiss this morning was just Gordon being Gordon, they were caught up in the moment. Besides it was just a brief touch of lips, not a real kiss.

As she took her place at her station Alara pushed thoughts of romance out of her head. She had a job to do and this was not the time to focus on what was going on with her and Gordon.

* * *

Gordon wasn't sure what was going on between Alara and him. For the past two weeks he would go back to his quarters only for her to show up to see him and sleep.

They would talk sometimes. She told him about her parents and how they were upset about her joining the military. He told her about his family and how his father was a drunk and his mother worked two jobs and they never go along, but he still loved them.

They didn't talk about the night they were together or the barely kiss. Gordon would also change the subject whenever Ed came into the conversation.

He could admit that he was being a bit petty about it, but he couldn't stand to hear Alara talk about Ed. She didn't seem to notice and for that he was glad.

He could admit to himself that he wanted her for himself, that he was attracted to her. Holding her in his arms every night was driving him to madness. He wanted to do more than hold her, but he wouldn't allow himself to cross that line.

He knew that she loved Ed and he couldn't handle hearing her say that to him again.

John always looked like he wanted to say something to him, but luckily the man kept his mouth shut. Gordon wasn't sure what he would say to John if questioned about his feelings for Alara.

He might say something he wasn't ready to admit, even to himself.

* * *

They had entered orbit around Carns 9 to drop off supplies. A routine mission that the Orville had completed millions of time.

Alara was in the shuttle bay supervising the loading of the supplies. Everything had to go just right.

There was a crew working on the other shuttle being lead by John. It had malfunctioned on the last mission and was in need of repairs quickly.

John had shot her a quick wave when she had come in. She had returned it before focusing on her duties. She noticed that John had been acting weird around her lately, but she was glad that it seemed like he was back to his normal space.

As they were finishing up Gordon and Kelly walked into the bay. They were in charge of delivering the supplies to the planet's surface.

At the sight of Gordon entering the bay Alara felt her heart start to pick up pace and she was starting to feel nervous.

After these last few weeks together, Alara felt as if her friendship with Gordon had grown stronger. She still didn't know why she felt this way towards him. She cared about him for sure, but there was just friendship between them. She knew that.

She loved Ed, so why would she feel like this towards Gordon? It made no sense.

She took a deep breath and turned back to the task at hand. This was no time to be thinking about those types of things. She had to keep telling herself that a lot more lately. Perhaps she was still tired from that lack of sleep those two week.

Yeah, that had to be the reason for why she felt this way.

After the last items were loaded, Kelly headed into the ship to get set up. Gordon was following behind her as well.

As he passed Alara she couldn't stop herself from speaking. "Stay safe."

He paused for only a moment, obviously not expecting her words. He sent her a quick smile. "I will," he said softly before continuing back inside the shuttle.

The whole exchange happened in less than a minute, but John saw the whole thing from where he was working. Even if he didn't hear what they had said to each other, John could see the strong emotions between them. How no one else seemed to see it, he didn't know. It was obvious.

Alara watched as the shuttle powered up and left the bay. She knew that Gordon was a great pilot and that is was a routine mission, one they had done dozens of times. Still she was worried about him, she didn't understand why.

"They'll be fine."

She turned her head at John's voice, unaware that the other man had walked up. "Gordon's the best pilot in the fleet. They'll be safe."

She turned back to watch the shuttle grow smaller and smaller. "I'm not worried," she lied. "I was just thinking that a security officer should have gone with them, just in case.'

"It's a routine supply run. In two hours they'll be back, just like clockwork."

Alara nodded. "I know, but it's my job to plan for the unexpected."

John said nothing in response, but when she looked back at him she could see that he wanted to say something to her. What, she didn't know.

Before she could ask him about it one of his team called him back to the shuttle with an issue. Alara shrugged. It probably wasn't important anyways.

On her way back to the bridge, Alara ran into Claire.

"Oh, Alara," she said with a smile. "You're looking better. I guess it was psychological."

Alara nodded. "I guess so. Have been sleeping better at least."

"That's good. I'm glad to hear it." Claire said. "I have to go now, but let me know if you need anything else."

Alara considered, for a moment, consulting Claire about the strange feelings she was having around Gordon, but she wasn't sure how to bring it up. She watched the doctor head down the corridor and said nothing instead.

Whatever it was, she would deal with it on her own and continued on towards the bridge.

* * *

They remained in orbit as they waited for the shuttle to return. Every minute felt like an hour to Alara making the wait unbearable.

Why was this supply run bothering her? It was the first one they had done since she and Gordon started sleeping in the same bed so she could be worried that he would be hurt and she would lose the person helping her sleep while he recovered. She didn't think that was it as it seemed like a petty and selfish reason, but she wasn't sure what other reason there would be.

Finally, after what felt like lifetimes, the shuttle was returning to the Orville. They had picked up a passenger who requested travel to the next station, which was on the way for the Orville anyways. Ed had confirmed that it would be fine and so the shuttle would be heavy with 3 passengers rather than just 2.

Without drawing notice, Alara stood and calmly walked off the bridge, down the corridors to the observation control room for the shuttle bay. The men there issued hellos to her, but she didn't hear or respond to them. Her focus was on the little shuttle and the red headed man currently walking out.

He was fine, just as she knew he would be, just as he had been the dozens of other times he had done this. A wave of relief covered her at seeing him alive and well.

Just as she was turning to leave the third person exited the shuttle carrying a small bag. Normally this wouldn't have drawn her gaze, but she knew this person.

Tall, thin body with long, black hair flowing down her back, sharp brown eyes and a glowing smile. Dressed in a long flowing dress and carrying a small bag with the initial "A" on it. Alara couldn't believe her bad luck.

She stood and stared down at her older, flirty, brilliant older sister, Amara.


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own The Orville or any of the characters, just taking them for a ride. Amara, however, is my original character and does belong to me. :)**

* * *

"We were surprised to find a Xelayan on Carns 9. When she introduced herself as your sister, that was even more surprising. Did you know she was there?"

Alara smiled at Kelly as they sat across from each other in the Mess Hall. "No, we don't talk much."

Kelly nodded. "Oh, I know. This job doesn't leave a lot of free time to socialize or keep in touch."

Alara glanced across the room as Kelly took another drink of her beverage. Amara was sitting with John and Gordon as well as several other men. It wasn't surprising, Amara was always more sociable and flirty than she was. Men typically flocked to her. It had caused to few problems back home before.

Kelly continued to talk, but Alara couldn't bring herself to listen to what she was saying. Her gaze was firmly fixed on Amara and Gordon.

They were sitting across from each other, talking. She couldn't see Gordon's face as his back was to her, but she could see Amara's.

Smiling at Gordon, laughing at his jokes, casually reaching over and touching his arm, giggling and flirting with him so openly.

Alara hated it.

She watched as Amara reached over and touched Gordon's shoulder before slowly caressing him down his arm, her smile turning from friendly to seductive.

What...the...Hell!

"Alara!"

At Kelly's urgent tone, Alara turned back to Kelly only to see a look of shock on her face. She was looking at her hands. Alara looked down.

The glass she had been holding was gone, replaced with pieces of broken glass. She opened her hand slowly and watched as the few pieces that had remained had been ground into dust with only a few cuts here and there.

It was then she noticed that the room had gone quiet. She glanced and found that Kelly's outburst had not only gained her attention, but the attention of everyone else in the room, including Gordon and Amara, who still had her hand on his arm.

She stood suddenly, her mind racing. "Excuse me," she said to Kelly before walking out of the Mess Hall, forcing herself not to look at anyone.

She thought about going to the Medical Bay for her hand, but instead she walked down the corridors straight to her quarters. She ignored anyone who spoke to her or looked at her strangely. She ignored the slight sting in her hand as well.

She didn't stop moving until she was back in her quarters, sitting on her couch.

She didn't know why she was so angry. Gordon was a good-looking man and Amara always flirted with good-looking men. Gordon didn't belong to her, he was free to do what he wanted with who he wanted. There was no need for this feeling of jealousy.

Alara shook her head. This was getting her nowhere. She wasn't jealous, she couldn't be. It didn't make sense. She had to be mad because her sister was always good at talking and interacting with men. That had to be it. It was logical.

Alara leaned back and shut her eyes. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Then she started to think of Ed, as she normally did when she was upset. It seemed to help bring her back and calm her down.

She could see him in her mind. His dark brown hair, bright blue eyes, commanding presence, how he looked at her when she would lift something heavy or open a locked door, his smile. She could feel his hands on her body, his lips on her skin, his voice as he whispered her name.

Only it wasn't Ed's voice, it was Gordon's.

The image shifted and Ed's brown hair turned dark red, a light beard grew on his face and his eyes darkened to dark brown. That boyish smile was aimed at her, not her sister, just her.

Alara's eyes flew open. What the hell was wrong with her? First she slept with Gordon, then she needed him in her bed in order just to sleep and now he was invading her fantasies as well. She shook her head to will the image away before leaning back and staring at her ceiling. She sat like that, her mind clear, for quite some time before she shut her eyes again to try and bring up Ed's image.

Before she could do that the bell for her door rang indicating someone was on the other side.

For a split second Alara hoped it would be Gordon but quickly pushed that thought away. A quick glance at the clock showed that it was now quite late and he was probably back in his quarters for the night. She wondered if she should try sleeping alone again but decided now wasn't the time to think on that.

She stood and straightened her uniform before answering the door.

The door slid open and Alara found herself looking at her smiling sister.

"Sister!" Amara said loudly before she walked in and wrapped her arms around her younger sibling. "It's been too long."

Alara took a deep breath before returning the hug. At the end of the day, this was her sister after all. She still loved her, no matter how much she annoyed her.

Amara released Alara a few seconds later and moved into the room with a smile. "I'm sorry I didn't see you in the Mess Hall before. I was a bit..."

"Distracted?" Alara filled in, unamused.

Amara giggled. "I suppose. You are so lucky. You get to work with all these smart and handsome men."

"I don't typically notice," Alara replied dryly. As much as she did love her sister, right now she just wanted to be alone.

"Not notice? I can't even imagine. I would be unable to get any work done at all with guys like John and Gordon around."

Alara froze at Gordon's name. The way Amara said that cause chills up her spine. Her hand curled into a fist, a slight pain from her cuts the only indication to her that she had done so.

"What's the story with those two anyways?" Amara said casually. "They are both very handsome and funny."

This is what she was worried about. If Amara wanted to become involved with someone on the ship then it would cause problems down the road. Amara always was good at making men fall for her and then leaving them, even if it wasn't on purpose.

"What do you mean?"

"Is one of them single? Maybe Gordon?"

Alara thought about shutting her sister down, telling her Gordon was taken, but that was a ridiculous thought. He was single, they weren't together and even that brief kiss before could have been a fluke. Even if it wasn't...she loved Ed...didn't she?

Alara mentally shook her head. Of course she loved Ed. She had forever. What the hell was going on with her?

She looked at her sister. "They are both single as far as I know," she replied.

Amara's eyes widened and started to glow. Alara regretted saying anything in that moment. Really?" Amara said. "Then I could potentially have both before I have to leave the ship."

The thought of Gordon being intimate with her sister filled her with anger. She took a deep breath and kept her emotions even. It was the best way to deal with Amara.

"Amara, please do not get involved with them. I do not want a repeat of Marcian and Luce."

Amara looked at Alara with confusion. Alara sighed. "You dated Marcian, dumped him and then dated his best friend, Luce, who you also ended up breaking up with. Their friendship ended after they got into a fight over you. Remember?"

Amara narrowed her eyes as if trying to recall the moment when her face changed to realization as she remembered the incident. "Oh yeah, I had started dating that professor at a nearby school by then and completely forgot."

Alara sighed. "I haven't. It was a terrible fight. I don't want John and Gordon to end up the same way. They have to work together and I have to work with both of them. Please don't jerk them around."

Amara rolled her eyes. "Little sister, I know what I'm doing. I never jerk men around."

Alara knew she didn't do it on purpose, that Amara was just living her life right now, but Alara still couldn't let her do this.

"Amara, I have to work with these guys, so please..."

Amara nodded reluctantly. "I get it, jeez." She ran a hand though her hair in frustration. "Maybe I'll just enjoy my time with one of them."

Alara knew that this was probably the best she was going to get. Amara was smart, but she did enjoy spending time with men as much as she enjoyed her job. This was her idea of a compromise. Alara smiled. "Thanks."

"Besides," Amara continued, "It really isn't that far to the next space station and getting two men into bed would take too much time. I guess I'll just go for Gordon alone. He was very sexy and funny. I bet he would be great in bed."

Alara forced her smile to stay in place even thought she could feel the rage flowing through her veins. Why the idea of Gordon and Amara together bothered her she didn't know, but she didn't care.

She talked Amara into going to sleep, letting her know that now would be the best time for it as they were heading into night shift and slowing down so it would be calmer. Amara had wasted no time falling into Alara's bed and falling right to sleep.

Alara quickly moved out of her quarters and down the corridors, her mission clear.

If Amara could not be convinced not to pursue Gordon, then she would have to convince Gordon not to fall for Amara's charms.

She got to Gordon's quarters in record time and prayed that he was there as she pressed the bell. She took a deep breath and pressed the bell again.

The door opened and Alara walked right in without even looking at him. "We need to talk," she said before turning and freezing.

Gordon was only wearing a pair of sweat pants and nothing else. His bare chest was right before her eyes causing heat to flow through her veins. He had some muscle mass and a light layer of red hair on his chest, she could see the muscles in his arms as he moved. Her heart was pounding in her chest at every move he made.

The door shut behind him and he looked at her as if unaware of the havoc his body was causing on her system. "What's up?"

For a moment Alara forgot why she had come to Gordon's room. She took a deep breath to calm herself and clear her mind. It only helped slightly.

"Amara is going to try and sleep with you."

Gordon raised an eyebrow. "Okay..." he responded, clearly confused as to what was going on.

"I'm asking you not to encourage her."

Gordon nodded slowly as if still confused. "Okay..." then as he looked at her, his eyes widened in humor. "I have to ask, does she want to sleep with me like we do or...sleep with me?"

Alara rolled her eyes in frustration. "You know what I mean. She wants to...you know..." Alara suddenly felt her courage leave her as he moved closer to her, his bare chest coming closer to her.

He smiled. "No, I don't think I do."

Alara took a deep breath to try and clear her mind again, but it was more difficult with him closer to her.

She lifted her eyes to look in his face, doing her best to keep her eyes off his chest. His eyes were almost twinkling in mirth and that boyish smile only made him more appealing.

"So," he said softly, "what did you mean?"

He was teasing her, and enjoying it. Alara narrowed her eyes. "This is serious!" she said firmly. "Amara is terrible about relationships and has left many broken hearts behind her. It always happens. And we...we..." she blushed slightly as the thought of him in her bed holding her before mentally shoving the image away, "we work together. It would be awkward."

Gordon looked at her and smiled. "This really bothers you doesn't it?"

Alara looked at him confused. "What?"

"Thinking that I could be attracted to Amara."

Alara grew angry. Not because he could be attracted to Amara, but that he had been able to see right through her so easily. Embarrassment flooded her and she glared at him.

"No! I just don't want anything to get complicated once she leaves, cause she will leave. We still have to work together."

She moved away from him and stated pacing, her mind a whirl. She kept talking about how terrible it would be if Amara and Gordon had something going on and then she left and how it could affect their work relationship.

Gordon was barely listening as he watched her. He couldn't help the feeling that Alara was acting jealous.

But that didn't make any sense. Why would she be jealous? He felt his heart leap as he hoped that she was jealous. That would mean that she might, just might, feel something other than friendship for him. It was a foolish thought, but he couldn't help having it.

Gordon moved to stop Alara's movements, blocking her moving body with his own. His hands came up and rested on her shoulders.

Alara felt her heartbeat pick up at his touch, the room suddenly feeling a lot smaller. It didn't help when he leaned down closer to her until his face was only inches from her own. She could move forward slighting and their noses would touch.

"You forgot," he said, his voice low and husky, "we also need to sleep together."

Her blood started to boil as she had an urge to lift her hands and touch that bare chest only inches from her own body, to close that distance between them and press her lips to his. She wanted a repeat of that night that she could only remember glimpses of.

Gordon's eyes seemed to flash and he quickly released her and stood straight, putting the distance back between them. Alara instantly missed his closeness. He took a deep breath and looked at her, suddenly serious.

"I'm not interesting in Amara," he said firmly.

Relief flooded Alara at those words. Why she was so relieved, she didn't know. She let out a sigh and felt her whole body relax. She sat on the bed and just let the exhaustion take over.

"I'm sorry," she said. "My sister drives me crazy sometimes."

Gordon moved over and sat next to her. "Family does that." He put his arm around her and held her against him. "Sometimes you just have to put up with it."

Alara chuckled, her vibrations running along his body as she did. It relaxed him to feel her against him like this.

"That almost sounded smart," she said in a joking tone as her head relaxed on his shoulder.

He smiled. "I got a few good ones," he said as he rested his head on hers.

They sat like that in silence. He felt at peace, comfortable and calm. Usually he would be in his room feeling almost lonely, but right now he just felt...right.

He listened as Alara's breathing evened out before glancing down at her. She had fallen asleep in his arms.

Carefully, so not to wake her, Gordon moved her into a horizontal position on his bed. He removed her jacket and shoes before tucking her under the covers. She moved slightly as she settled in the bed, turning onto her side, before she relaxing.

He smiled at her. She looked so peaceful in sleep and he was glad that he could provide that to her.

She had come to warn him of her sister's intentions. It was both funny and cute. Amara was a flirt but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. Besides, he was sure once he turned her down she would go for someone else. Gordon had seen many woman who believed that they could have any man they wanted but the minute one rejected them they moved on.

His father had hung around several of these women without his mother's knowledge.

Besides, although Amara was beautiful, Alara was much more so and had a inner light that shined out from within. Alara was smart, serious at times but still able to have fun, strong and not just physically, and has a vulnerability to her she doesn't like showing to others.

But she had shown him.

Gordon knew that if he fell for Alara it would not end well. She had stated many times that she was in love with Ed, even though Ed was completely oblivious to how she felt.

As his best friend, Gordon knew that Ed wasn't a bad guy, but he also knew that Ed could be single focused and was still hooked on his ex-wife. Gordon also knew that when you compared him and Ed, they were complete opposites. If Alara was in love with Ed, it would make sense that she would look for Ed-like traits in anyone else she became interested in. Gordon knew that he wasn't Ed, would never be Ed, could never be Ed.

Once Alara got the sleep she needed and was able to fall asleep without him being there, this closeness between them would end. As long as he didn't fall for her they would be able to maintain the friendship they had had since Ed took over The Orville.

He ran a hand over his face and sighed softly. He know all that, but it was still torture to be so close to her, hold her in his arms each night, wake up with her each morning, talk with her about anything and everything and nothing at all.

He yawned. He needed to sleep. Maybe Alara had passed off the insomnia she had before to him or something. He crawled into the bed behind Alara, careful not to disturb her. He looked at her back as he relaxed, wishing he could just reach out and pull her into his arms and against his chest, hold her as he truly wanted to.

He sighed once more before shutting his eyes. He took a deep breath, inhaling the scent he associated with Alara, and drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own the Orville or any of the characters, I do own Amara however.**

* * *

Gordon was actually glad Alara had given him the warning about Amara, however that didn't mean he was prepared for Amara's seduction attempts.

Amara was aggressive.

She seemed to take the "not interested" approach as playing hard to get and it just seemed to make her try harder.

Gordon was on his way down the corridor to his quarters with Alara. They were about to head to the Mess Hall to get some food before going back up to the bridge. He asked her to walk with him because of Amara's aggressive nature.

It wasn't that he was scared of her, he wasn't. However, she would throw herself at him at random times and he needed someone to give him an excuse to escape.

"Thanks for walking with me," he told Alara. "I couldn't very well as John for this."

"It's fine," she replied, her eyes forward. "This is why I wanted to warn you."

Gordon glanced at Alara out of the corner of his eyes. It had been a couple days since she had warned him about Amara's intentions. That was the last time they had slept in the same bed together. He wondered if she was sleeping well.

Was his role in her life already over?

He couldn't bring himself to ask her. He didn't want to hear those words come out of her mouth. He would rather be her teddy bear than have no role in her life.

They got to his quarters and the door opened. He walked in and found a body suddenly flung on his own, arms wrapping around his waist.

A female body.

A naked female body wrapped in his blanket.

"I've been waiting for you."

Gordon kept his arms pinned to his side as he looked down at Amara smiling seductively up at him.

"Amara?"

He glanced at Alara who had come in behind him and was looking at her sister with a raised eyebrow.

Amara looked over and the smile faded as she laid eyes on her younger sister. She released him and moved back, holding the blanket tight against her body.

"Alara...how good to see you," Amara said with a smile. "I was just..."

"Amara, how did you get into Gordon's room?"

Amara gave Alara a guilty smile. "I...uh...hacked the entry pad." She giggled nervously. Alara nodded slowly. "I wasn't expecting him to return with someone..."

Gordon just watched the interaction between the two sisters. It seemed that despite her intelligence, Amara preferred acting younger than she was. It was like Alara was the older sister looking over the younger, even though she was the younger sister.

"Despite the fact that you thought he would be alone, that is considered breaking and entering. I could lock you up for that," Alara said firmly. "I'll overlook it for now, but you need to get dressed and get out of here right now."

Amara nodded and then glanced at Gordon. She smiled at him shyly. "Next time, I'll get you to invite me in," she said softly before grabbing her clothes and walking into the bathroom.

Gordon looked at Alara as she let out a sigh. "Sorry about that," she said. "I'll keep a better eye on her. We should be at Starbase 239 soon and she'll be on her way to her next assignment."

"It's alright. Family...right?" He said with a slight shrug.

She chuckled slightly and smiled at him. She looked tired. "Yeah," she said softly.

Gordon looked at her in concern but before he could say anything Amara walked out of the bathroom, this time fully dressed.

"Alright, I'm leaving," she said before glancing at Gordon with a flirty smile, "...for now."

Alara sighed before taking her sister's arm and guiding her out of Gordon's room.

"I'll see you on the bridge later," she said before she walked out, Amara in tow.

* * *

After the room incident, Gordon asked Alara to find temporary quarters for him, just in case Amara decided that she didn't want to wait for his invitation back to his rooms. She was all to quick to oblige.

Amara didn't stop her aggressive seduction attempts despite him showing no interest in her. Alara had even banned her from the bridge when she showed up and tried to sit in Gordon's lap while he worked.

He was thankful he had one place she could know where he was and not come after him. He was getting tired of her attempts.

It also didn't help that he found himself being unable to sleep without Alara next to him.

He missed her, more than he realized he would. It bothered him how much he missed her just sleeping next to him.

He pushed the thoughts out of his mind as he walked into the Mess Hall hoping to get some food before he went back to the bridge.

Suddenly a pair of arms encircled him from behind, a pair of arms he was slowly starting to hate.

"Hey sexy," Amara's voice said, even her voice was starting to bother him. "Off-duty?"

"Nope," he said firmly as he gently removed Amara's arms from him. "I'm actually here looking for..." he glanced around the room and spotted Issac sitting not too far from him, talking with someone Gordon didn't recognize from Engineering, "Issac."

He moved quickly across the room, not once glancing back at Amara. "Hey buddy," he said once he reached him.

Issac turned, the bright blue orbs simulating eyes glowed. "Hello Lt. Malloy. How might I assist you?"

"We had that...thing today, remember?"

"I'm afraid I do not understand."

Gordon took a deep breath, holding back his urge to smack the artificial life form. Instead, he reached out and grabbed Issac's arm. "Of course you remember, you remember everything." He lifted Issac out of the chair and they started walking towards the door. As he passed Amara, Gordon said "Gotta go," before quickly walking down the corridor to the nearest lift.

After they entered the lift Gordon released Issac and let out a breath. This was getting ridiculous.

"Lieutenant, I am afraid I still am unaware..."

Gordon sighed. "We didn't have anything planned. I needed to escape."

"Escape? I do not understand. What did you need to escape from?"

Gordon didn't look at Issac. "From Amara."

Issac seemed to ponder this new information. "Is Lt. Kitan's sister unappealing in some way?"

Gordon shook his head. "No, it's not like that. She's just a bit annoying."

"It seems as though she has chosen to pursue you for some purpose. Do you not wish to see what it is she is wanting from you?"

Gordon rolled his eyes. "I know exactly what she wants from me," he replied. "I just don't want to give it to her."

"I see," Issac said. "They why does she continue to pursue you if you will not give her what she is looking for?"

Gordon shrugged. "Beats me. Maybe she likes a chase, maybe she thinks it's a game or some form of foreplay. In any case, I'm not interested."

The doors opened and Gordon walked out casting one last glance back at the life form in the lift. "Thanks for being my shield today," he said before the doors shut behind him, enclosing Issac inside once again.

Gordon let out a breath. This was getting out of hand and he was getting too tired to deal with Amara. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going and bumped into Alara right outside the bridge.

"Gordon? Are you okay?" she said as she looked up at him.

"Yeah, just tired," he said softly. "Amara tried to jump me in the Mess Hall. Luckily Issac was there and I could use him to escape."

Alara gave him a sympathetic smile. "Sorry about that."

He shook his head. "It's not your fault," he said. It was then that he noticed Alara seemed like she did almost a month ago, tired and unable to focus. "Not sleeping well?"

He hadn't realized he had spoken until she looked back up him. "Not really," she replied. "A few hours here and there."

He nodded. "Did you want to...?" He wasn't sure what he was asking, but he knew that he couldn't sleep without her next to him anymore. He needed her with him, in his bed, in his life.

Forever.

The sudden thought shocked him as pieces started to fall into place. Before he could think any more on it, Alara's voice broke into his thoughts.

"I thought about that, but what about Amara?"

"I don't give a damn about Amara," he replied fiercely. "You need your sleep." He didn't dare mention that he needed his sleep as well and found that now he only could do so well when she was near.

Alara smiled at him. "Yeah, I do. Alright. After Amara goes to sleep I'll find you."

Gordon watched her go back to her station. Why Alara felt inferior to Amara he didn't know or care. She was so much better than her sister.

He knew now how deep he was in with her, not that he could ever say anything to her about it. She was in love with Ed. It made him so jealous he couldn't see straight sometimes. She deserved everything she wanted, but at the same time he wasn't sure he could stand it if she got it.

As long as Ed remained unaware of her feelings, Gordon knew he could remain close to her. Although this gave him the chance to spend more time with her, Alara would forever be pining after another man.

Either way, Gordon knew that he would end up the loser. Alara would not love him.

He took a deep breath and cleared his mind. He wasn't going to think about this any more today. Later, when he was alone, he could lay his feelings out and reflect on them. Right now, he had work to do.

* * *

The Orville computer beeped loudly as they took another hit, the ship jerking to the side. This run-in with the Krill was unexpected and they were outclassed.

Bortus and Alara worked together to make sure they would have something to fire back at the enemy ship as Gordon maneuvered the ship out of harms way as best he could.

He was focused. The entire ship and all it's passengers were in his hands. He wasn't going to die here, Alara wasn't going to die here. Not if Gordon Malloy had any say in it.

He turned the ship in several sharp and evasive maneuvers. They missed several shots from the Krill ship, except one.

A sharp hit slung the ship to the right knocking Gordon out of his chair and hard to the floor. Pain surged up his right are so sharp he thought he might have broken his arm.

He moved back to his station, ignoring the pain. He would worry about the arm after he got them out of here.

"Our deflectors are nearly depleted, sir," Bortus said firmly.

"Issac, do we have enough power to get out of here?" Ed yelled over the commotion.

"Yes, Captain. All adjustments have been made."

"Gordon, get us out of here."

Ed didn't have to tell him twice. Using only one arm, Gordon quickly put in the coordinates and they were zooming away from the Krill vessel.

Gordon let out a breath of relief. The pain in his arm aside, they had escaped pretty easily. He was ready to get a good night's sleep tonight once he got all patched up.

"Alara?"

At the sound of Kelly's concerned voice, Gordon turned and looked towards the sound of Alara's station.

Only Alara wasn't at her station. She was lying on the ground with Kelly kneeling right next to her. She was still...too still.

His blood froze. She couldn't be...

The minutes it took for Claire to get to the bridge were agonizing. Gordon was barely breathing. He tried to look away but found that he couldn't. His entire being was focused on Alara's still body.

She was breathing, that much he could tell from the brief rise and fall of her chest, but she wasn't responding to Kelly's voice.

Claire quickly looked her over before having a medical officer help lift her up to take her to Sick Bay. She moved to him and checked his arm, informing him that it was indeed broken and that she had a machine in Sick Bay that would be able to mend the broken bones.

He wondered idly if it could do the same for a broken heart.

As he followed Claire, the medical officer and Alara off the bridge Gordon knew that he was going to have to back away from Alara. She loved Ed and he would never be Ed.

He was too selfish and would try to keep her for himself if he didn't back away from her. If he did he knew that she would hate him. If Ed became interested later on, Gordon knew that he would do everything he could to keep them apart.

He would have to be the first one to walk away.


	6. Chapter 6

**I don't own the Orville or any of the characters, only Amara.**

Gordon tried his best not to look across the medical bay at Alara, but with nothing to do for the 2 hours it would take to mend the broken bones in his arms he found his gaze constantly on her.

How could he have been so stupid? How could he have allowed himself to fall for Alara?

He knew that it wouldn't happen. She loved Ed, not him.

He hated the idea of separating himself from her, but he knew that was the best way to protect both of them. He knew that, in the long run, he would end up hurting her if he didn't let her live her own life.

Claire was running all sorts of scans on her, looking both confused and concerned before she would try another scan with a different instrument. It worried him.

He thought she was just knocked out, but as he watched Claire run yet another scan on her he wondered if it was more serious than he thought.

He was so focused on Alara that it didn't register John had approached him until the man was right next to him.

"Hey man, you alright?"

Gordon looked at his friend with a smile, grateful for the distraction from Alara no matter how brief it turned out to be. "Yeah, broken arm is all."

John nodded before looking over at Alara and then back at Gordon. "And Alara?"

Gordon's smile faded as his eyes drifted to the now too familiar sight. "Claire said she knocked her head up on the bridge, but she's been running a ton of scans on her. Not sure what's going on right now."

John nodded. "You guys still..." he looked at Gordon seriously, as if studying him closely.

Gordon didn't notice the intensity of John's gaze, his own focused on Alara. Still he answered John's question as if nothing were amiss. "We were until Amara came onboard. She still couldn't sleep very well so I was still helping her out with that."

"Dude?"

Gordon looked at John with a confused expression. John had a look of disbelief on his face. Gordon narrowed his eyes. "What's up with you?"

"Are you...?" John seemed unsure how to continue. "I mean...you are...?"

"Dude, spit it out."

John took a step back and took a long look at Gordon, which only made Gordon a bit uneasy. John was very smart and more observant than others took him for. Gordon waited for a moment before taking a deep breath. "You are seriously freaking me out."

John blinked and looked at Gordon again, his eyes still serious.

"Don't lie to me," he said firmly. "You're in love with Alara."

There it was. The very thing he was trying so hard not to admit fully, not even to himself. He had fallen in love with Alara. It was completely ridiculous really. She was in love with another man, his best friend. She was several years younger than him. She was way too good for someone like him in all ways. Yet, he was still in love with her.

Gordon didn't respond, but his gaze drifting to Alara in sadness was enough to confirm what John had already suspected.

"How did that happen?"

Gordon shook his head before looking back at John. "I don't know."

"Are...are you going to tell her?"

Gordon shook his head again. "No," he responded firmly. His gaze traveling back to Alara. Ed, Kelly and Claire were standing next to her getting updated on her situation. How he wished he could be over there and know just what was going on with her.

John looked at his best friend on the ship, a man he had worked next to for months before moving down to Engineering. He knew this man like he was his flesh and blood brother. He could see just how much it was hurting him to stay quiet about this, to keep it inside.

"Gordon," John said gaining Gordon's gaze back to him. "I think you should do it."

"Do what?"

Both men turned from their serious discussion to see that Ed had wandered over to check in with him.

Gordon forced himself to smile at his rival, even if the other man was one unknowingly. "John was just suggesting I look into artificial limbs since I seem to have a bad habit of having them damaged or stolen."

John nodded. "Yeah, trying to liven the mood."

Ed nodded, as if unaware that the conversation he had interrupted hadn't been as serious as it really was between these two men. Luckily they were known pranksters, so seriousness was never considered to be part of them and the lie was easily believed.

"Well, I just wanted to say good job today," Ed said to Gordon. "Your quick flying got us out a bad jam fast."

"Yeah," Gordon said with a slight laugh. "Just gotta do what I can to stay on top." Gordon tried to keep himself from speaking anymore, but he had to know. "How's Alara?"

Ed looked serious. "Claire said she was running some more tests to be sure of a few things, but she is confident that Alara should be up and moving within the next few days."

Gordon nodded, his heart relaxing. Claire was just making sure everything was okay. Alara would be okay. Even if he had to distance himself from her, at least she would still be around and breathing.

Claire walked over at this time with a smile on her face. "How are you feeling?"

"Feeling better."

Claire tapped a few buttons on the machine and it opened to reveal Gordon's arm. He lifted it out and flexed his fingers, all the pain gone.

"Any pain?"

If only she knew how hard that question was to answer in this moment. Physically there was no pain, nothing to indicate anything was ever broken. Emotionally however...there was nothing but pain.

Instead he smiled at her," Nope, all good."

Claire smiled back. "Good. Take the rest of the shift off and rest. It would do you no good to go back to work. If you have any pain later on today, come back and see me and I'll check you out to make sure everything set back correctly."

Gordon nodded before walking out of the Sick Bay, his gaze firmly set on not glancing at Alara lying on a bed only a few feet from him.

John was fast on his heels, wasting no time once out of ear shot of anyone else to continue their previous discussion.

"You need to say something," he said with concern. "I can see that this is eating you up inside."

"It's fine," Gordon replied although it was anything but. They stayed quiet until they reached his temp quarters, both men stepping inside and the lights coming on.

"It isn't fine," John said firmly after the door shut behind them. Gordon went and sat on the couch in the room. "You can't keep this to yourself forever."

"I can and I will," Gordon said firmly before taking a deep breath. "Even if I said something, it wouldn't matter. Alara is in love with someone else."

John seemed shocked by this news as he sat in the other chair in the room. He ran a hand down his face. "But...she was sleeping with you..."

Gordon looked at his buddy, his face expressing his sadness at this topic, but unable to let it go. "It was just sleeping," he said, "For some reason my presence helped her sleep so I was just helping her out. There was never anything sexual about it."

"So you guys never..."

Gordon took a deep breath. He leaned back on the couch, his eyes facing forward. "Only once," he said softly. "She was...very drunk and came onto me. I tried to resist her, but..." he shook his head. "Afterwards we both decided it was a mistake, to just stay friends and forget about that night. That's when she told me she was in love with another man.

"Then she was having the issues sleeping and before I knew it I was getting to know things about her I hadn't before, seeing a side of her that no one else had seen before. I..." he looked at John. "I was stupid and fell in love with her knowing that nothing would ever come of it."

The two men we silent for several minutes. Gordon leaned back and looked up at the ceiling. He felt emotionally drained

"Gordon, I'm sorry."

Gordon smiled at John's words. "It's alright man, " he said. "I did this to myself."

"What are you going to do now?"

"I'll distance myself from her. Eventually we might be able to go back to being just crew mates, maybe even friends. I won't be able to be near her without desiring her for myself. If I did that, it would only hurt me more in the long run."

Gordon looked over at John with a sad smile. "Trust me," he said. "It's better this way."

John heard those words and could only think Gordon was trying to convince himself of that rather than John, but said nothing more on the subject. Instead, the two men sat in silence for a while before John realized too much time had gone by and he was needed back in Engineering.

He stood. "I need to get back, but for what it's worth, I think Alara cares about you more than you think she does. If you want to keep this quiet, then I will, but I still think you should tell her."

Gordon looked at his friend and gave him another sad smile. "See ya later, man," he said as if John had said nothing other than he was leaving.

John nodded at him and turned and left the room.

It was only when he was alone that Gordon allowed himself to let out the pain he was feeling deep inside.

For the first time in years, Gordon cried.

* * *

Alara was disoriented when she awoke. This wasn't her bedroom, nor Gordon's and she was sleeping alone. The room was way too bright as well. She opened her eyes, adjusting to the brightness slowly. Her mind was starting to clear as memories were coming back to her.

The last thing she could remember was they were in a battle with a Krill ship. She remembered the ship being tossed about, falling from her chair, pain.

"Oh good, you're awake." Alara turned her head slowly to see Claire standing next to her. "You got a nasty bump when you fell. We were worried."

We? Gordon too?"

She looked around, but it was only her and Claire in the room. Maybe he wasn't worried. She didn't know why it bothered her that he wasn't there when she woke up. It shouldn't bother her. They were just friends...right? But if they weren't friends then what were they?

She pushed the thoughts aside. "How long...?" she said softly.

"About 24 hours. Luckily your body heals pretty quickly."

"Anyone else injured?"

"There were a few bumps and bruises. Lt. Malloy had an arm broken in a few places. Nothing we couldn't handle."

Gordon had been injured. Her heart seized at the thought. What if it had been worse? What if...? She didn't even want to think about it.

"There is something I did want to discuss with you alone," Claire said seriously. Alara raised an eyebrow, but nodded that she was fine with that. "I didn't notice it before when I scanned you, probably because it was too soon to tell, but today while conducting scans I was able to pick up the signs. Were you aware that you're pregnant?"

Alara shot up, her eyes wide. "What?"

"You're pregnant, about a month and a half or so along."

Alara was in shock. She hadn't noticed any signs. Of course she hadn't been looking for any. This early along the only sign would be...lack of sleep...unless the father was nearby.

Oh, no.

Alara already knew that there could only be one option as to who the father was, she had only been with one person that would make the timeline add up. She hadn't even considered that she could be pregnant, so much had been going on that she hadn't noticed.

"What am I going to do?"

Alara hadn't realized that she had spoken out loud until Claire answered her. "You'll be alright, but you should probably tell the father about this. I'm guessing he isn't Xelayan since the only other one on the ship is your sister."

Alara nodded. "He's human," she replied.

She wasn't sure how she could tell Gordon. What would she say? How would he react? This wasn't supposed to happen. What if he rejected her? She was ready to panic at the thought.

Claire seemed to notice her reaction and took her hands in her own, drawing Alara's worried gaze to her calm one. "Listen to me Alara," she said firmly. "There is nothing to be afraid of. Children are born every day. If you are scared to tell the father because of how he will react, don't be. If he cannot accept it, then you can raise the child alone. I've raised two myself. You will be okay."

Alara took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She nodded, but couldn't bring herself to speak.

Claire nodded back. "Good," she said softly. "You may want to talk to the Captain about this as well. You will need a leave of absence from your post for at least a year. Xelayan's typically carry for 6 months, but since this child is also half human, which carries for 9 months, we have no idea really when the child could be born. You will need the extra time just in case."

Alara nodded as she listened to Claire. Although she was hearing and understanding, she still couldn't get the thought out of her head that she was carrying a baby.

Her baby.

Gordon's baby.

Their baby.

Even thought she was terrified of how he would react to the news, she still couldn't help the feeling of joy that filled her at the thought.


	7. Chapter 7

**I do not own the Orville or any of the characters, just borrowing them for a moment. I do own Amara, however.**

* * *

Claire released Alara from Sick Bay after going over what she would need to do in order to provide proper nutrition for the baby. Despite Claire telling her to go straight to Captain Mercer regarding this before telling the father, Alara found that she needed to tell Gordon first.

She was worried about how he would react, what he would say. After all, they had never considered that she might have gotten pregnant that night. She already knew that no matter what, Gordon needed to know.

She reached his temp quarters and rang the bell to let him know that someone was there. Seconds later the door opened and Gordon stood there.

He looked surprised to see her there. His eyes were wide as he looked at her.

"Hey Gordon," she said with a smile. "May I come in?"

He looked indecisive, as unsure if he should. "I'm actually on my way out," he said firmly. Alara blinked at the tone from him. She didn't know why that tone bothered her, but it did.

"Oh...' she said confused. "I just..."

Gordon didn't wait to hear what else she had to say. Instead he gently moved her out of his way and walked away from her down the corridor.

Alara stood there in shock. Gordon had never walked away from her like this before, not once. She was so surprised that she stood there even after he turned the corner and disappeared. Gordon had never talked to her like this, treated her like this, as if she wasn't anything to him at all, not even a friend.

What the hell was going on with him?

* * *

Alara tried several times over the next few days trying to get Gordon alone so they could talk. He always had a convenient excuse or was rushing off somewhere. Mostly he just walked away without even acknowledging her.

It hurt, more than she had thought it should. They were just friends.

Maybe it was hormones.

She decided on her own, since getting Gordon to talk to her seemed to be a nearly impossible task, how she was going to handle her pregnancy. Of course that meant speaking to Ed.

She had yet to bring it up with him, but knew that she had to do so soon. Claire was already getting onto her for not doing it yet and threatened to do so herself. Alara had to assure her it would be done by the end of the day, which was rapidly approaching.

She arrived at Ed's office and rang the bell. She took a deep breath and then heard him call out "Enter."

She walked in ad stopped. Ed wasn't alone.

Gordon was standing next to Ed, looking at something on Ed's computer. He glanced up when she walked in but then immediately looked away. He was actively ignoring her.

"Am I interrupting something?" she said softly. "I can come back."

Ed smiled. "Not at all," he replied. He turned to Gordon. "We'll go over this some more later on," he said.

If Ed noticed Gordon was acting strangely, he said nothing. Gordon only nodded and quickly walked out of the room, brushing past Alara without a glance or a word. Alara ignored the pain at his rejection.

Ed gestured to the chair in front of him. "Please, have a seat."

Alara took a deep breath to push the pain from Gordon's quick exit from her body as she took a seat in front of Ed.

"Tell me what's on your mind," he said with a friendly tone.

"I'm afraid that I have some...news, sir. News that would make it impossible for me to do my job for the next year."

Ed's smile faded and he looked at Alara in seriousness. "Anything serious?"

Alara shook her head. "No...not particularly. Dr. Finn has requested this of me and, as ship's doctor, I am obligated to listen."

"Medical leave?" Ed said before leaning back in his chair. He seemed to really be confused on this as he looked at her. "Are you sick?"

Alara shook her head.

Ed leaned forward, his arms coming up to rest on the table, his hands intertwined. "I'm afraid I'm going to need a bit more information. If you aren't sick or..."

"I'm pregnant, sir."

Ed's eyes widened, his thought only half finished as Alara's words hit him. "Pregnant?" he said surprised. "As in...with child?"

Alara nodded. "Yes, sir."

Ed leaned back, his eyes still as wide as dinner plates. "That's so...surprising. I mean, congratulations."

Alara smiled. "Thanks," she said. "You are the first person, other than Dr. Finn, who knows."

Ed's eyes narrowed slightly. "You haven't told the father yet?"

Alara shook her head. "He has been avoiding me," she replied. "I don't know why."

"Who is the father?"

Alara debated telling Ed. He was her commanding officer and he would probably need to know that two of his senior officers were going to have a baby together, but at the same time, with everything going on with Gordon right now. She just didn't want to talk about it.

"Honestly sir, I would prefer to keep that to myself for now," she said firmly. "In fact, I would like to keep this whole conversation and my pregnancy a secret as well."

"I'm pretty sure that will be near impossible," Ed replied. "Most women, no matter the species, shows signs of pregnancy. People will notice."

"Not if I'm on Xelaya."

Ed blinked. "Your home planet?"

Alara nodded. "We are stopping at Starbase 239 soon to drop off Amara as well as pick up our next shipment of supplies. I'll leave with Amara and head to Xelaya from there. Amara was already thinking of going home for a visit anyways."

"I see," Ed said softly. "Of course, leave is granted. But Alara..." Ed stopped before letting out a deep breath. "I really think you should tell the father before you leave."

Alara had wanted to, tried to, dozens of times. She thought back to how Gordon had practically ignored her just now, rushing out of Ed's office as if she was a plague victim and he was afraid to get sick. As if she meant nothing to him at all, not even a crew mate. She shook her head.

"No," she said firmly. "I tried multiple times already and he has ignored me at ever turn. I'll try again when I return. Maybe then he'll be willing to listen."

Ed looked like he wanted to say more, ask more, but instead just smiled at her.

It was then Alara noticed that the entire time they had been together in this office alone not once had her heart thumped wildly in her chest like before, she hadn't gotten worried she would misspeak or that she would blurt out her feelings. It was like she was never in love with Ed in the first place.

"Promise me though," Ed said drawing Alara's mind back to the conversation. "You will return in one year."

Alara smiled, her first real smile in days. "Of course, sir," she replied.

* * *

They arrived at Starbase 239 only two days later. Alara continued to try and speak with Gordon, but he continued to ignore and avoid her. She knew that she wasn't going to be able to tell him before she left and leaving a letter was not her style.

This news needed a face to face conversation, a conversation Gordon seemed determined to avoid.

Amara had been surprised when Alara had told her that she would be traveling with her Xelaya, but had welcomed the company.

Alara still had told no one else of her pregnancy. She had sworn Ed and Claire to secrecy, but they weren't gossips so she had no worries.

She took her small back and walked down the corridors to the shuttle bay. Everyone she passed said good-bye. She had run into John in the bay as well. He was going to pilot the ship down to the starbase and load up the supplies. Amara was already on board, for once on time.

"Are you sure about leaving?" John said. Although everyone was aware of Alara's upcoming leave, no one knew why. Rumors flooded all areas of the ship from drug abuse to bored with the job. Surprisingly no one mentioned pregnancy as a possible reason.

"I'm sure," she replied. "I have to do this."

John nodded saying nothing more as he boarded the shuttle, even though he looked like he had more to say.

Alara looked around the bay one last time before getting on board herself. She took a seat next to Amara as John booted up the shuttle and flew it out of the bay.

On the bridge Gordon was forced to watch Alara fly away. He knew it wasn't forever. Everyone was aware the absence was for one year. 365 days without her here.

He was grateful for this separation. It allowed him to be himself rather than the unfeeling asshole he had been the last several days. Alara had come to talk with him, several times, and he never did listen to what she had to say. It wasn't going to be the words he wanted to hear the most from her and anything else would just hurt him. If he allowed himself just one more moment of time with her alone he would never let her go again.

This was for the best. His role as "teddy bear" was over.

"Why did she need the year off?" Kelly said once the shuttle had docked with the starbase.

That was the million dollar question. Alara had requested a year away from the Oville, a year that had been granted as well. And no one, except for Ed, knew why.

"She had...personal business to attend to," Ed said. Gordon could hear in Ed's tone that there was more to that story, much more.

"Seriously Ed," Kelly replied firmly. "Both you and Alara have been acting strange lately since this leave was approved. What the hell is going on?"

"Kelly, it was told to me in confidence. All will be revealed in a year, just wait it out."

Gordon heard Kelly let out a frustrated sigh, the same one he wanted to let out himself. Although he knew that he couldn't be at Alara's side, he still was worried about this. It was out of character for her. It only made him wonder what could have happened to make Alara want to get away.

Had she confessed to Ed?

Gordon's eyes widened as he pondered that thought. Kelly had said both of them were acting weird. Was it possible that Alara had confessed to Ed and he had rejected her feelings? Was she heartbroken? Was she hurting?

The thought of Alara in pain angered him so much that he almost stood up and punched Ed in the face. Instead he took a deep breath and calmed himself.

He couldn't punch Ed. First off, the man was his best friend. Secondly, Ed was his commanding officer. Thirdly, if it wasn't for Ed, Gordon wouldn't even be sitting in this chair at this moment.

Plus, he wasn't sure that was the reason she was leaving.

He would have to wait on Alara. Maybe, when she got back, his feelings wouldn't be as strong and he would be able to come to her as a friend and listen to her concerns. He would find out then whether or not Ed deserved to be knocked sideways for breaking Alara's heart or not.

For now, he would need to be patient, something he was rarely good at, and wait for Alara's return.

It was going to be a long year.


	8. Chapter 8

**I do not own the Orvile or any of the characters, I do own Amara however.**

* * *

To say that her parents were thrilled to have her and Amara home would be an understatement. To say that they were happy that Alara was pregnant would be an overstatement.

Amara, who was also completely unaware of the pregnancy, was just as shocked as her parents had been when Alara gave them the news.

Alara's mother was reasonably shocked at first, but then embraced the idea of a grandchild.

Amara was the same, excited about the niece or nephew she would have in the future.

It was Alara's father who was the problem.

He insisted that Alara had been abandoned, even when she stated quite plainly that she was not. He was upset that the father was human. Most importantly, he wanted to know the father's name.

This was something only Alara knew, and she wasn't about to share it. Not until she at least told the father about it, if she could even get a conversation going with him that was when she returned.

Sleep was something that was still eluding her until she discovered she had accidentally packed one of Gordon's shirts in her bag. She must have picked it up one day and thought it was hers only to find that it wasn't much later. She slept with it and sleep came easier. It still smelled like Gordon.

Her mother went to all her doctor's appointments with her, Amara held her hair back when she was sick, even her father helped out by bringing her crackers and water in the morning to help with the sickness.

When the day came, Alara was sure that she was ready. Of course, she had only been prepared for a Xelayan childbirth.

She hadn't realized how difficult childbirth could be, especially since her child was from two different planets. The pain was almost too much for her, but she forced herself to ignore it as best she could. She was stronger than this, she knew it.

Then, after what seemed like hours, she heard the cry of a baby ring out. Relief and joy flooded her at that sound.

"It's a male," the doctor said. "And he's healthy."

Alara let out tears of happiness at those words. Her baby was healthy. Her boy was healthy.

The baby was placed in her arms and she couldn't help the feelings rushing though her at the sight.

He had Gordon's wide brown eyes, his forehead was smooth as well, he had Alara's ears, she could even see Gordon's nose there too.

But the most prominent feature was the small tuff of dark red hair on his head.

She smiled down at her baby, joy filling her up at the sight. Tears filled her eyes and she let them fall as she looked at him.

She already knew that in 4 months she would need to return to the Orville. She also knew that if his hair color remained the same in that time it would be impossible to hide his parentage. After all, Gordon was the only red-headed man on board, it would be pretty easy to figure out.

However, in this moment, none of that mattered.

"What's his name?"

Alara looked up at the nurse. She hadn't thought of one yet, unsure what exactly to call him. She looked at the boy, who resembled his father so much, and knew that an Earth name would be the best thing for him.

"Jack," she said to herself, remembering that there had been an 20th century actor that Gordon had mentioned once before with that name. "His name is Jack."

The nurse looked at Alara confused, after all that wasn't a common name on Xelaya, but said nothing of it. Instead she smiled. "That's a wonderful name."

Alara smiled back before returning her gaze to Jack in her arms. "Hello, Jack," she said. "I'm your Mommy."

Jack didn't make any motion that he understood her, he yawned and looked at her with tired eyes.

The door opened and her parents walked in followed by Amara. Today there was no words about abandoned daughters, responsibility, shotgun weddings or the like. Today, both of her parents were too busy looking at their first grandchild.

"He's beautiful darling," her mother said before pressing a kiss to her forehead. "You did wonderfully."

"Thanks," she said. "I named him Jack. It's an Earth name."

Her father twitched at the mention of Earth, but said nothing. Instead he smiled down at the small bundle in his daughter's arms. After a few more minutes, the parents left leaving the sisters alone.

Amara stepped forward and looked down at the young Jack, who was not sleeping.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Alara looked up at her older sister, confusion plain on her face. "Tell you?"

Amara looked at Alara. "Tell me that you and Gordon were together."

Alara froze. "What?" Alara didn't know what to say.

Amara smiled. "Anyone who's seen him and this child would know. He looks just like him."

Alara had figured that much out on her own, but to hear someone else say it only confirmed her worst thoughts. "Don't tell Dad," she begged. Amara nodded. "And we weren't together. Jack was a result of one night when I was very drunk and seduced him. It was weeks before you even came on board the ship and it was just the one time."

"So you never thought about a repeat of that night?"

Alara blushed. She couldn't deny it. She had thought about it dozens of times. "Gordon isn't interested in me like that," she said as a means of defense. "Besides, I'm sure he only gave him to my seduction because I was so aggressive about it."

Amara chuckled. "I don't know about that," she said. "He never responded to any of my seduction attempts, and I was even more aggressive over a longer period of time."

That was true. He had actively tried to avoid Amara, almost running away from her. He had said that he wasn't attracted to her, but that didn't make sense. All men were attracted to Amara, it had always been that way. Why not Gordon? It didn't add up.

"I'm so confused," Alara said softly to herself.

Amara sat next to her gently and wrapped her arms around the woman and child with a smile. "I think that there is more between you and Gordon than either of you realize. In time, it will all come clear. Meanwhile," Amara gently touched Jack's head "we just need to focus on this little guy."

Alara smiled. Her sister, who had always been flirty, really was smarter than she let on most of the time. "Thanks," Alara said.

Amara nodded before standing and walking towards the door. Before she left she turned and looked back at Alara over her shoulder. "Although Jack is your focus for now, don't discredit his father. If he knew about Jack, he might surprise you."

Alara didn't get a chance to respond before Amara walked out of the room. She looked back down at her son.

She already knew that Jack would look just like Gordon as he grew. She would show Jack all the love that Gordon had rarely received from his own parents. She would love this child so much that if Gordon didn't want to be part of his life, Jack would never miss him.

She didn't want that. She wanted Gordon to be in Jack's life.

She could almost see them, Jack a bit older running around Gordon, giggling. Jack running up to her with a wide smile, his little arms wrapping around her neck as she pulled him into a tight hug.

Then another pair of arms encircled them both, Gordon's. He held them both close to him, looking down at them with that boyish smile, his eyes bright with mirth.

She shook the fantasy away. Jack was sleeping now, exhausted from the day's events. She almost laughed.

She knew, even if she and Gordon were to raise Jack together it would not guarantee that they would be in some sort of relationship. That had never been part of their lives before Jack and she doubted his existence would change that.

Even if she could admit to herself that the idea sounded so very wonderful.

* * *

The months had passed so slowly, but here they were again. Starbase 239. Gordon couldn't help the nervousness filling him at seeing Alara again. This year had been unbearable.

There had been days when he had wanted to slug Ed for even speaking her name, but he didn't. Ed had actually noticed Gordon's attitude change and called him out, as a friend, about it. Gordon had laughed it off.

John was the only one who understood, the only one who knew what Gordon was going through. He didn't do anything more except make sure he ate and slept, but that was enough.

Now, the year was over and Alara was coming back to the Orville. She wouldn't be able to go right back to her duties as Chief of Security, but she would be on the ship. He could see her again.

Gordon prayed that he would be able to keep it together.

Despite the distance, despite the time that had passed, his feelings for Alara had only grown stronger. He would approach her, as a friend, and find out if Ed had been the reason she had left. If so, Ed was going to get it. If not, well...he wasn't sure what he would do if he got to that bridge. He knew that if he tried to be her friend he wouldn't be able to stop himself from trying to keep her for himself. But he also knew that he couldn't go back to ignoring her either.

It was all fucked up.

The shuttle left Starbase 239 and headed to the Orville, one Alara Kitan on board.

Alara looked out the front of the shuttle, her heart pounding in her chest. Jack was in her arms, held tightly against her.

His hair hadn't changed. If anything it had just gotten longer and darker, making him look even more like Gordon. Maybe no one would notice, but she doubted it.

Amara had offered to come with her, but Alara had told her it wasn't necessary. After all, she needed someone to stay and look after her father. After this whole year he still wanted to know who the father was and Alara had never given him a name.

When the shuttle landed in the Shuttle Bay of the Orville, Alara smiled as she saw that both Captain Mercer and Commander Grayson were waiting for her. Although Ed knew why she had left, he was going to be shocked when he saw a baby that resembled his old friend so much.

She took a couple deep breaths before stepping out.

Ed walked forward right away, greeting her warmly. She smiled before glancing over at Kelly. Kelly was looking at her in shock. Ed hadn't even told her why Alara had left. Her secret had been kept.

"Alara...you...a baby?"

Alara smiled. "I'm guessing the Captain kept my secret for me. Thank you," she said to Ed. He nodded. Kelly stepped forward.

"This is why you left?"

Alara shrugged. "Medical leave. I couldn't very well be Chief of Security while pregnant. Claire would never have allowed it."

Kelly looked down at the child and her eyes went wide. "He looks..."

"Human?" Alara finished. "I know. His father is human."

Kelly shook her head but said nothing more. Ed looked down at the child too, his own eyes widening in shock. It was at this moment Alara knew that, like Amara, anyone would be able to see the connection.

Ed looked back up at Alara, his eyes still wide. "He has red hair," he said, almost like a question.

Alara smiled. "Yeah, he got that from his father, as well as his nose and eyes."

Kelly looked at Ed. "Red hair...from his father...?" Ed nodded as if Kelly hadn't heard the words that Alara had just said, even thought she was standing close enough that there was no way she didn't hear her.

Kelly looked back at the baby and Alara before taking a step back in shock. "You mean to tell me," she said, her voice getting louder as she spoke, "that this baby is Gordon's?"

The last word rang out in the now silent Shuttle Bay. Alara heard a tool drop to the floor, but no other sound. Jack woke up and was sniffling, his small face bunched up before he started to cry.

Alara looked down at Jack and gently cooed him, calming him back down. She looked up at the still shocked pair standing in front of her.

Chances were good, now that Kelly had blurted it out to everyone, that Gordon would learn about Jack before she could talk to him. She had wanted to be the one to tell him herself, but fate seemed to have other plans. A story this juicy wouldn't stay in the Shuttle Bay for long.

At least then he would talk to her.

She smiled at Ed and Kelly. "It's been a long trip," she said. "Jack needs a nap and I know I could stand a few hours sleep myself. I'll just see myself to my quarters."

She didn't wait for a response. Instead she walked out of the still quiet Shuttle Bay and down the corridors to her quarters. It was only a matter of time before Gordon came to see her and she wanted to be well rested when he arrived.

* * *

To say that he was suddenly aware of eyes on him in the Mess Hall would be an accurate statement. When he looked up to see just who was staring at him, he was surprised that it was nearly everyone in the room, and no one was trying to hide it.

It was a bit nerve wracking when he realized it as he had no idea why that would be. John sat down across from him but Gordon didn't turn to him.

"Hey John, any idea why everyone is looking at me?" He turned to John to find the same look of shocked surprise everyone else had when looking at him today. Gordon looked at his friend in confusion. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Dude..." John said, his voice conveying his shock.

Gordon couldn't take it anymore. He sat his spoon down and looked at John seriously. "What the hell is going on here? Why are you, and everyone else, looking at me like that?"

"Have you not heard?"

Gordon raised his eyebrows. Now he was getting somewhere. "Heard what?"

John cleared his throat. "Alara didn't come back alone," he said softly.

Gordon's heart seized. "Like her sister came back with her or..."

John shook his head. "No, not her sister. It's..."John looked like he had a hard time coming up with the words. Gordon's mind was flying. If not her sister then who? A lover? He didn't like that idea, not one bit. If he lost to Ed, that was one thing. He had known about that since the beginning. But if he had lost her to some no name person he couldn't stand it. He would have to transfer out of here, go to another ship, any ship.

Gordon stood. John's eyes flew up to him. "It's fine," Gordon said. "Don't tell me."

Gordon turned to leave the room, still well aware of the eyes on him. Why there were staring at him didn't make sense if it was about Alara's lover. It had nothing to do with him at all.

He was walking down the corridor to head to his quarters when he ran into Issac.

"Ah, Lt. Malloy. It is good that I could speak with you. Might I have a moment of your time?"

Gordon sighed, wanting to push his way past the artificial life form and just go to his quarters and sulk. "What do you need Issac?" he said reluctantly.

"I was merely curious how you felt to learn you were a father?"

Gordon's whole body froze. His mind went blank, the only word left was 'father'. He looked at Issac, his dark eyes wide. "What?"

Issac spoke again. "I am merely curious as to how you felt upon learning that you were a father to Lt. Kitan's son? It must have been a shocking piece of information to hear."

Gordon wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. This had to be a joke, a prank. Alara couldn't be pregnant with his child. They hadn't seen each other in a year. He didn't laugh.

"I haven't seen Alara in a year," he said. "I can't be her child's father." It hurt him to say those words. If Alara was pregnant, he wished he was the father. He found that he wanted everything with Alara, the whole package, everything. A dream that he knew couldn't come true.

"Lt. Kitan's son is already on board the Orville," Issac said. "She brought him back with her from her home planet. From what I have heard, the boy is named Jack and looks similar to you. Were you unaware of this?"

Gordon couldn't believe he was hearing this. Alara had already given birth? To a boy? Who she gave an Earth name to? Who resembled him?

Gordon didn't respond to Issac as he quickly ran down the corridors. The stares in the Mess Hall, they made sense now. If Alara claimed that the child was his they would be wondering how it had happened.

He stopped at Alara's quarters and pushed the bell without thinking. He didn't know what he was going to say or how he was going to react. He took some deep breaths, trying to calm his racing heart.

The door opened and he found himself lost in her eyes yet again.

Alara was standing there before him, looking just as she had when she left. Her hair was a bit longer, but she didn't appear any different. Maybe the rumors were wrong...

A cry, a baby's cry, came from behind her and Alara's head turned. She glanced back at him. "Come on it," she said before walking towards that sound.

He walked in and allowed the door to shut behind him. Alara had gone into the bedroom and Gordon thought about following her, but just couldn't bring himself to do so. He thought about sitting, but as soon as he did he stood back up. He couldn't stop moving.

"Gordon?"

He turned to her sweet voice and found that she was holding something in her arms.

Not something, someone. A baby, a child.

"This is Jack," she said looking at the small being in her arms before she looked back up at him. "He's our son."

Gordon fell onto the sofa then, his entire body going limp at those words. His eyes stayed on Alara and the bundle in her arms.

"A baby?" he said softly, as if still trying to wrap his mind around it. "I have a son?"

Alara smiled softly at him before crossing the room and sitting next to him. "He looks just like you," she said turning the bundle towards him. "See?"

Gordon looked down at the small boy in Alara's arms. He had Alara's ears, that much was obvious. Otherwise, he looked human. He had Gordon's eyes and nose. Most noticeably, that red hair on top of his head.

Before Gordon realized he was doing it, he reached over and gently touched the top of Jack's head. It was so soft.

Jack reached up and his small hand wrapped around Gordon's pinky finger, still too small to wrap all the way around. Gordon couldn't help the overwhelming feeling that swelled up inside him at this.

Never once had Gordon considered fatherhood, never once had he thought about having children of his own. But now, looking at his son, Gordon felt like this was how it should be. He already loved this child more than himself and he had only seen him today, for a few moments.

"Gordon..."

He looked up at Alara, who had lifted a free hand to his face. Her hand was soft against his cheek. It was then that he realized that he had been crying as Alara gently wiped the tears away.

"I'm sorry," he said softly, taking a deep breath. "I don't know what came over me."

Alara smiled. "It's okay. I felt the same way when I first heard him cry. It was so overwhelming that the tears just flowed out of me."

Gordon looked back down at Jack and then back at Alara. "Why didn't you tell me?" His voice was calm and curious. He wanted to be angry that she hadn't said anything to him, but found that he couldn't in this moment. Sitting here, with her, their son in her arms. He just wanted to know.

"I tried," she said, "many times after I was released from Sick Bay. You kept avoiding me."

Gordon remembered. She had tried talking to him alone, many times. He had run from her. He wondered idly if she was still in love with Ed. He pushed that thought aside. Even if she was, he would always be connected to her because of Jack. Even if nothing more came of it, at least he could see her happy.

"I'm so sorry," he said. "I have no excuses."

She smiled at him again. "It's in the past," she said softly.

She was so beautiful, too beautiful to have gotten caught up with the likes of him. He knew that, but still couldn't stop himself from leaning closer and pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

Alara hadn't been expecting it, but at the soft touch of his lips on hers she felt that familiar warmth flood her. This was the warmth that had been with her when she had slept in the same bed as him. Gordon's warmth.

The kiss was soft and gentle, over way too quickly. Gordon pulled back and smiled at Alara. "You gave me a son," he said. "Thank you."

Alara smiled back. "You gave me one too," she said with a slight nudge to his shoulder. "Thank you."

The two laughed as Jack looked up at them. Then his little face contorted and he let out a cry.

Both looked back at the boy in Alara's arms. "He must be hungry," she said before standing. "Here!" Before Gordon realized what exactly was happening, Alara had placed his son in his arms. "I'll be right back."

Gordon hadn't held a baby before. He was terrified. He looked down at the small crying bundle without a clue as to how to calm him.

"Come on little guy," he said as if trying to reason with a crying baby. "I'm you Dad, you should listen to me."

Jack kept crying.

"You know it just causes your mother trouble when you cry," he tried.

Jack kept crying.

Gordon rolled his eyes before he stated gently swaying back and forth. Jack's cries slowed but didn't quite stop. Then Gordon started to sing.

It was an old Earth nursery rhyme that was actually quite dark when one thought about the lyrics, what with babies falling out trees and all. However, the melody was solid and kept a gentle tone. So he kept singing, watching as Jack's face turned from red crying to mildly confused to content.

He didn't notice Alara standing in the doorway to the bedroom, a bottle in her hand. He didn't see the tears that filled her eyes at the sight either.

Alara couldn't stop the tears no matter how she tried. This is exactly what she had hoped for. Gordon's acceptance of Jack. She had been so worried that she had almost called the Orville and said that she wasn't coming back, but she knew that wasn't an option. She had a job to do after all.

Now, looking at father and son together, Alara felt wave after wave of emotion fill her. It overwhelmed her and she let out the tears.

It wasn't until she let out a sniffle that Gordon looked and up and noticed her tears. His eyes narrowed in worry. "Alara?"

She shook her head. "Nothing," she said. "Hormones are still a bit messed up from the pregnancy and then seeing the two of you together, well... it just got to me a bit." She smiled at him as she wiped the tears from her cheeks.

She walked over and handed Gordon the bottle and helped him feed Jack.

"So," he said softly as Jack drank from the bottle, "what do we do now?"

Alara gave a slight shrug. "I don't know," she said. "This is all new to me. I always expected to be married when or if I had a child. I don't know what we should do here."

"All I know," Gordon said, "is I want to be in Jack's life."

Alara nodded. "Yes, I want that too."

Gordon looked around the room and then back to Alara. "Maybe we should share quarters until he's a little older. Share the responsibility of caring for him."

Alara smiled. "I like that plan."

Gordon nodded before looking around again. "My quarters are too small, so I would have to move in here." He looked at the couch he was currently sitting on. "I could just sleep on the couch. It should work."

Alara shook her head. "Just sleep in the bed with me."

Gordon froze. Then slowly he looked up at Alara with serious eyes. "Alara, I can't do that."

Alara narrowed her eyes. "Why not? We did it before."

Gordon took a deep breath. He wasn't sure how to explain it to her, but he knew that if he slept in the same bed with her now, knowing that she was in love with another. It would kill him.

"I just don't think it would be a good idea," he said. "Besides, what would Ed think?"

Alara blinked. "Ed? What does he have to with this?"

Gordon shook his head. "No, I just...Alara, I can't sleep next to you. Please understand. It just wouldn't be a good idea."

Alara really looked at Gordon now. He looked like he was in pain, as if the idea of sleeping next to her was painful, like pulling teeth.

"I see," she said in a clipped tone. She couldn't help feeling upset at this. He obviously loved Jack, but wanted nothing to do with her.

Then why had he kissed her?

She shook that thought out of her head. She looked back at Gordon with firm eyes. "You can sleep on the couch," she said. "It's best for Jack that we are together."

Alara stood and walked out of the room and Gordon felt a pull at his heart. He hadn't tried to offend her, but he couldn't sleep next to her if she was thinking of another man. It would hurt too much.

He looked down at Jack and smiled at his son. Regardless of Alara's feelings toward Ed or Gordon's feelings towards Alara, Gordon knew one thing for sure.

Both he and Alara would do anything for Jack.


	9. Chapter 9

**I don't own the Orville.**

* * *

Living with Gordon was nothing like Alara had thought it would be. He was neat, picked up after himself and took time out of his day to spend with Jack. It was like he wanted to be there, had always been there.

But Alara couldn't help the pain she felt when she watched him bunk down on the couch. No matter what she said, he didn't want to be in the bed with her. She didn't understand why. What had changed?

Gordon seemed the same around her and others, joking and laughing all the time. She wasn't sure what was going on in that head of his. All she knew was she didn't like it.

After a week of being on the Orville, Alara took Jack to check in with Claire. She would have to put Jack in the ship's daycare facilities while she and Gordon worked, but first he had to be checked out and made sure he was healthy enough to be around the other children.

"He's a healthy baby boy," Claire declared as she handed Jack back to Alara. "A bit of a mischievous one too. He'll probably grow up to be a prankster like his father."

Alara smiled. "Probably, but I hope he gets something from me. He is already looking more and more like Gordon everyday."

Claire chuckled before looking up from putting in her notes about the exam. "I'm sure he will. It will be the best of both of you. That's usually how it works."

Alara nodded. Claire tilted her head slightly before asking. "So, how's Gordon taking all this?"

Alara rocked Jack slightly. "Fine, better than fine actually. You would think that he planned to have a child this whole time the way he fawns over Jack."

"How about you?"

Alara looked at Claire a bit confused. "What do you mean?"

Claire shrugged one shoulder. "Well, this was a bit of a surprise, for everyone. Most people are wondering how you two got so close. You seemed to be friends, but didn't seem to have the type of relationship that would mean sleeping together."

Alara nodded. "We were friends, are friends," she said. "I was going through some things a year ago and the night Jack was created was a result of my stupidity. I got drunk and basically threw myself at Gordon, who happened to be the person who was helping me get back to my room that night." She looked down at Jack. "Despite everything, I am glad I have Jack."

"Do you love him?"

"Jack?" Alara said with a laugh. "Of course, he's the most important person in the world to me."

Claire smiled but shook her head. "No, do you love Gordon?"

Alara froze. Love Gordon? She hadn't thought about that before. So much had happened that she had pushed all thoughts of love out her mind. Could that be why it hurt when he wouldn't sleep next to her? Could that be why she had been so upset about Amara flirting with him? Had she been jealous? Is that why she couldn't sleep without dreaming of him? Why her thoughts were filled with him?

Was she in love with Gordon?

She looked at Claire with wide eyes. Claire was still smiling, as if she had asked the question already knowing the answer. Alara wished she would tell her, because right now she was so confused about this. She cared for Gordon, more so than she had anyone else before until Jack. She liked being around him, he made her smile, he could make the day better just by being himself.

Was that love? Real love?

"I..."

"Bridge to Lt. Kitan!"

Bortus' voice rang out in the medical bay. Jack moved in her arms at the sudden noise before settling. Alara took a deep breath. "Go ahead," she replied, honestly confused about the call. She wasn't cleared to return to work yet.

"The Captain is requesting your presence on the bridge. Your father has contacted us."

Alara felt fire fill her veins, anger flooding her senses. Damn her father. She had told him that she would discuss Jack's father with him after she was sure what was going to happen with that. Things were still up in the air between Gordon and herself. Why was he contacting the bridge instead of her directly?

"On my way." She turned to Claire. "Could you watch him?" she asked hopefully. "This could get out of hand quickly."

Claire nodded. "Sure. I was just about to take a break anyways."

"Thanks," Alara said before handing Jack over to Claire and heading to the bridge, praying that Gordon wasn't there. This didn't need to get complicated, and if her father figured out that Gordon was Jack's father, it would get very complicated.

As luck would have it, she ran into Gordon just outside the bridge. She could hear her father yelling, something he rarely did unless he was really angry. She grabbed Gordon's arm and kept him from walking into view.

"Wait," she said. "That's my father in there and he isn't very happy with Jack's father, with you."

Gordon looked at her with confusion. "Why?"

Alara heard Ed respond with a calmer voice, but then her father's louder voice overshadowed Ed's.

"Let's just say, he wasn't thrilled that I returned home pregnant and unmarried," she said. "Just please wait here until I talk to him."

Gordon looked like he wanted to say more, but Alara didn't wait. Instead she walked out onto the bridge to face her father.

"Captain, I demand to know who the father is!"

"Dad," Alara said calmly, staring at the man on the viewfinder. "We talked about this. Jack's father is between me and him. You are not involved."

She walked in and stood next to Ed, her eyes focused on the angry man on the screen.

"Not involved?" her father screeched. "He is my grandson, my first. I sure am involved."

From his hiding place, Gordon listened to the conversation. Apparently Alara's father wasn't taking the whole unwed mother thing as calmly as Alara would have liked. It killed him to know that he had caused this problem in Alara's life, with her family.

"We are his parents," Alara responded. "We will decide what is best for him."

"We?" her father replied. "A man who abandoned my daughter to raise his child alone gets no say in any decisions."

Gordon felt anger fill him at those words. He would never have abandoned Alara, pregnant or not. Every move he had made lately has been for her happiness over his own, something he rarely did for any other person before.

"Dad," Alara said, her tone clearly angry. Gordon took a deep breath to calm his own anger to hear her words. "I was not abandoned, I told you that multiple times. Until I returned to the Orville he didn't even know that I was pregnant. I made the choice to keep quiet about it, to keep it from him. A choice I have come to regret. Since he learned about Jack he's been a wonderful father to him."

"Is he planning to marry you?"

Gordon wanted to, which surprised him. He had always thought that anything would be better for him than marriage. His parents marriage was a failure, Ed's ended in divorce and heartache. He had never wanted that for himself.

Of course, that was before Alara.

"If he doesn't than he may not be the best choice for Jack."

Gordon fought the urge to rush out there and give that man a piece of his mind.

"Who else would be a better choice for Jack than his own father?" Alara said firmly.

"Anything is better than a man with no morals who left my daughter pregnant and alone. You made a mistake getting caught up with a man like that."

Gordon couldn't take this anymore. He knew that this had to be hurting Alara. That man Alara called her father could say anything he wanted about him, but he wouldn't say a damn word about Alara like this.

"Dad," Alara said. "We will make all decisions regarding what is best for..."

"He's got to be the one! Jack looks just like him!"

Alara turned to find that Gordon had walked out onto the bridge, right into view of her father. She could have killed him. She had been trying so hard to keep her father from making this more complicated and Gordon just had to ruin it.

Alara turned back to the screen. "Dad..."

"Do you plan to marry my daughter?"

Alara froze. It was then she remembered that she was on a full bridge, with Ed and Kelly right next to her, and everyone was hearing this conversation, staying quiet to hear the answer to that question.

"Well," her father continued, "are you going to marry her and make this right?"

Alara took a step forward, hoping that somehow she could just end this whole conversation now. "Dad, this is..."

"Yes."

Whatever Alara had been planning to say flew out of her head at Gordon's voice. She turned to him with wide eyes. Had he just said what she thought he had?

Alara wasn't the only one who had turned. All eyes had turned on the redhead, who was looking at her father with a firm gaze.

Even her father seemed taken aback by that response, the anger gone from his voice. "What did you..."

In the calmest voice she had ever heard from him, Gordon said, "You asked if I was planning to marry your daughter. If I, the man you believed abandoned," Gordon nearly growled the word, "her, was going to make this right. I said yes."

If the first time he said it had shocked her, the second time nearly floored her. What the hell was he doing? Why did the idea fill her with happiness?

She thought back to Claire's earlier question. Was she in love with Gordon?

"Now," Gordon continued, "we are a Union ship with Union missions to complete. Since this has been cleared up I say farewell."

Gordon then crossed the room to her old station, reached over the man sitting there in shock and disconnected the call. Her father disappeared from the view finder, but the room remained silent.

Alara couldn't keep her eyes off Gordon's back, her emotions running all over the place. She wanted to ask him if he meant it, but was terrified he didn't. She wanted to run to him and hold him in her arms.

She wanted him to be hers. She wanted him to want to marry her.

The realization washed over as she knew without a doubt that she loved him.

She loved Gordon.

Before she could say anything, Gordon turned and walked off the bridge, not even waiting for anyone to say anything to him or to be dismissed. Alara watched him leave, still too in shock with everything that had just happened and everything she had just realized to run after him.

"What just happened?" Ed said, breaking the silence after Gordon was gone.

"Lt. Malloy stated that he would wed Lt. Kitan," Isaac said as if Ed had asked a real question. "It will be fascinating to witness."

"Alara?" Kelly said, drawing Alara's gaze from where Gordon had disappeared. "Did you know?"

"Know?"

"That Gordon wanted to marry you?"

Alara shook her head. Everything was so confusing. Gordon had told he that he wanted to be in Jack's life, but didn't want to sleep next to her. Told her father than the was going to marry her, but she knew that he planned to never marry anyone. "I'm so confused."

"Had you two talked about it?"

Alara shook her head. "No, it never came up. Not once."

Alara looked at where Gordon had disappeared. "Maybe he just said it put my Dad off track," she said. Logically that made the most sense, even if she didn't want that to be true.

"I don't know," Ed said firmly. "I've never seen Gordon so serious. If he was just trying to throw your father off, he was pretty convincing."

Alara wasn't sure what to think anymore. Although her feelings for Gordon were clear to her now, she had no idea how he felt about her.

And Alara was terrified to ask him.


	10. Chapter 10

**I don't own the Orville.**

* * *

Alara spent the next two weeks trying to talk to Gordon, but she could never get him alone. Even when they were in their quarters, he focused his attention on Jack, practically ignoring her.

She was terrified to talk to him, terrified that he only saw her as the mother of his son and not as a woman, terrified to learn that his words to her father were just to shut him up.

However, she knew that if she did nothing then she would never know, and not knowing terrified her more than anything.

Gordon, it seemed, didn't want to discuss anything with her. Their conversations were short unless focused on Jack. It was almost like he was avoiding her, like they were almost strangers.

It didn't help that the last week she had spent alone, with Gordon working on the bridge and Jack in the daycare center getting used to his new environment. She had all day to ponder her feelings for Gordon and what his for her could be.

It honestly just made her more confused.

She was happy when she learned that she would be able to go back on active duty tomorrow. At least that would give her something to do, something to keep her mind off all this.

A bell dinged indicating someone was at the door. Alara lowered the book she had tried reading to take her mind off Gordon. It hadn't worked, she had just been reading the same sentence over and over and still not understanding what was going on.

"Enter!"

The door opened and Alara stood, surprised, to see Ed entering her quarters.

"Captain?"

"Hey Alara," he said with a smile, that same smile that used to make her knees weak. Now, it did nothing. "Ready to get back to work?"

She laughed. "You have no idea," she replied before gesturing him to sit. Ed sat in the single chair and Alara retook her seat on the couch. "It's been so lonely since Jack went into daycare. I have nothing to do."

Ed nodded. "I can understand that." Ed then leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. He looked serious for a moment. "Have you been able to talk with Gordon about that day?"

Alara's smile faded and she shook her head. "No," she said softly. "He's been avoiding me, but I don't know why."

"Do you really believe that he would just say something like that to throw your father off?"

Alara turned from Ed, her eyes going to her hands clasped in her lap. "I don't know. On the one hand it sounds like something he might do, but..." She looked up at Ed, "I want to hope that he was serious."

Ed's eyes widened at those words. He leaned closer, his hand reached over and touched Alara's shoulder in a friendly gesture. "Alara, are you saying you want to marry Gordon?"

Alara looked back up at Ed, her eyes wide. "I..."

The door rushed open and both Ed and Alara turned to see Gordon standing in the doorway. He walked in but paused at seeing the two of them there. Gordon's eyes went from Alara and then to Ed and then to Ed's hand on Alara's shoulder.

"It seems as though I am interrupting something," he said softly.

Alara could see pain in Gordon's eyes. As if seeing her and Ed together caused him pain.

Ed stood abruptly, his own eyes wide on his friend. If Alara had noticed the pain Gordon was feeling, it was possible Ed had as well.

"Gordon," Ed said in a friendly tone, almost too friendly. He had noticed Gordon's barely masked pain. "I was just welcoming Alara back to active duty tomorrow."

Gordon shook his head, backing away from them. "No, no," he said, his voice going slightly higher. "No need to stop on my account. I'll see myself out."

Then, before either Ed or Alara could stop him, Gordon turned and left the room. Alara stood and took a few steps towards the door he had just walked through. What had just happened?

"I think he got the wrong idea," Ed said with a sigh.

Alara knew he had. She could see it in his eyes, that pain at seeing her and Ed together. Why would he feel that way? It wasn't like she and Ed had anything going on...

Alara could smack herself. Gordon knew about her old feelings for Ed. He had been the only person she had confessed it to. He must still think...

Without a word to Ed, Alara took off into the hallway after Gordon. If there was a chance that he felt something and was keeping away from her because of a misunderstanding, she had to clear it up right this minute.

She ran down the corridor hoping to run into him, but to no avail. He had disappeared.

She moved through the ship, knowing that he wasn't on the bridge. That would be too easy for her find him. He wasn't in the Mess Hall, Sick Bay, none of the simulators and he hadn't been by the daycare center to visit Jack.

She was walking down the corridor back to her quarters when she ran right into John.

"Alara," John said with a smile. "Aren't you getting ready to come back to active duty tomorrow?"

Alara looked up at John with a small piece of hope. "Do you know where Gordon is?"

John appeared confused. "What do you mean?"

Alara shook her head, as if clearing her thoughts. "I have to find him. He misunderstood something and I..." she took a deep breath. "I just need to speak with him right away."

John really looked at Alara then, as if studying her. Then he smiled, a knowing smile that made Alara nervous. That was John's "up to mischief" smile.

"He's hiding out in his old quarters," he said with an almost chuckle.

Alara almost wanted to question him about it, but decided that would have to wait. She had to talk to Gordon first. "Thanks!"

John watched Alara hurry off down the corridor with a smile on his face. Those two...they were going to be a hell of pair.

Alara didn't bother buzzing the door, instead using her security clearance to force her way in. The door opened and she stepped into the smaller room.

Gordon jumped up at her entrance from the small bed, the only piece of furniture in the room. "Alara..."

Alara let out a breath. "You are one hard man to find Gordon Malloy."

Gordon took a deep breath. "I was just giving you some time to tell him."

Alara raised an eyebrow. "Tell him?"

Gordon turned and looked out the windows of the room. "Tell Ed that you love him."

Alara couldn't believe that she was hearing this. "Ed? Gordon, why are you saying this? What are you thinking?"

Gordon let out a breath and turned back to Alara. "Look," he said seriously, "the only think we have between us is Jack. You don't love me and you don't want to marry me. You deserve to be happy and if you love him, well...you should tell him."

Alara couldn't believe she was hearing this. "Is that really what you think?"

Gordon looked down slightly. "If you are in love with Ed, if he will make you happy, then you should be with him. You should tell him how you feel."

"Is that really how you feel?"

Gordon wouldn't look at her. Alara couldn't help the tears that filled her eyes at this. What could she say to make him understand?

"If you love someone, you should tell them," Gordon said firmly.

"Is there someone you love?"

Alara didn't know why she asked that question. It would only hurt her if he said he did and it wasn't her. However, it did make Gordon turn and look at her.

The look on his face was almost painful. He had to love someone to give her that look. Alara almost wanted to take the words back, to say she didn't need to know. However, she had gone this far and she had to know at this point.

"I love Jack," he said finally. "My only goal is making sure his mother is happy. That's all I want."

Alara looked at Gordon as if seeing him for the first time. He was talking about making her happy, but didn't speak of himself. She thought back to the times they spent together. Gordon had slept in the same bed as her every night, not once making a move on her. Gordon had let her cry out her tears for her love for Ed despite his anger at being considered Ed's replacement. Gordon telling her to confess to Ed and be happy.

Gordon had always put Alara first.

"Do you..." Alara took a deep breath, but it was the only explanation she could come up with. "Do you honestly still think I'm in love with Ed?"

Gordon's eyes narrowed. "Aren't you?"

It all made sense now. His distancing himself from her, pushing her away, telling her to confess to another man. He had honestly thought she was still in love with Ed and wanted her to get what she wanted.

Only he didn't know that it wasn't what she wanted anymore.

She shook her head. "No," she said softly. "I'm not in love with the Captain. Looking back, I don't think I ever really was."

Gordon's eyes widened and his body was rigid, however Alara noticed a flicker of emotion in his eyes. A flicker that filled her with hope.

She took a step towards him, now within arms reach of him, and took a deep breath.

"Gordon, I'm in love with you."

Alara watched as Gordon's eyes widened, surprised at her words. He looked in shock, like he had when he learned about Jack. Shock and happiness.

"But...you were so sure about Ed before?"

Alara smiled. "That was before you."

Before she realized what was happening, Gordon reached out and pulled her against him, his arms tight around her body. His body was trembling against her own.

"Gordon?"

"You have no idea," he said, his voice soft in her ear, "how happy I am right now."

Alara's heart jumped and she couldn't help the tears filling her eyes at those words. Her own arms lifted and wrapped around him in a gentle embrace. For what seemed like forever they just stood and held each other.

Then Gordon pulled back and looked at her, his hands coming up to frame her face. His eyes were looking directly at her, filled with love and happiness. "I've been in love with you for a long time Alara Kitan," he said.

Alara smiled, but she still had to ask.

"So, my strength...?"

Gordon smiled and leaned close to her, his forehead rest upon hers. "It's part of you and I love every part."

Alara let out a soft sigh. "I was sure when you told me you didn't want to sleep next to me that it had to be about that."

Gordon chuckled before pulling back to look at her. "That had nothing to do with it," he said. "I thought you still had feelings for Ed. If that was the case there was no way I could handle lying next to you knowing that you were thinking of someone else. I'd have gone insane."

Alara placed her hands on Gordon's chest, his heartbeat strong beneath her fingers. "I confused my respect for him with love. He treated me like I was just another crew member and that my strength didn't matter. I didn't know what real love was until I got to know you."

"Oh, Alara," Gordon said before leaning down and covering her lips with his own. Alara wrapped her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. It had been too long since she had felt this with him. She wasn't going to waste a moment with him going forward.

This kiss was filled with passion, desire and all the pent up emotions they had had between them the last year.

When they pulled away they smiled at each other.

"I guess I didn't lie to your father," Gordon said. "You will marry me, won't you Alara?"

Alara smiled up at him, her heart filled with more love than she had thought possible. "Of course I will."

Unaware of what his parents were up to, Jack slept in his crib in the daycare center, his dark red hair fluffing out from the top of his head head, his small hands curled into little fists. As he slept he didn't know the wonderful news that was being spread across the ship.

That Gordon Malloy and Alara Kitan were going to be married and this small group would become a family.

* * *

5 years later...

Jack looked into the crib at his baby sister. She looked like Mommy more than Daddy. It was weird. He looked over at his parents. Mommy was sleeping on the couch, her head in Daddy's lap. Daddy was gently stroking her hair and looking at her with a kind expression.

"Daddy?" Jack said, drawing his father's attention to him. "Is Mommy okay?"

He smiled at his son. "She's fine, just tired. Andrina takes a little more attention than your mother was expecting. You were a calm baby compared to her."

Jack moved over and carefully climbed onto his father's lap, avoiding his mother's head. "Will she always be like this?"

His father shook his head. "No, as she gets older it will be easier."

"Can I help?"

His father lifted his hand and placed it on Jack's head, gently messing the mass of red hair he found there. "Of course you can, by staying out of trouble and being nice to your little sister. You have a responsibility now to help me protect them both."

Jack smiled at his father before cuddling closer to him and following his mother's example, falling right to sleep.

With his family around him sleeping, Gordon felt at peace. He had things he had never thought he would now. A sweet and caring son, a beautiful new daughter and Alara, the woman he loved more than he had thought it possible.

He leaned his head back on the couch and closed his eyes.

This right here, this was happiness.

* * *

 **This is the end of this story. It came to me randomly one day and I just had to write it. I hope that you enjoyed it as well.**


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